Book Description
Occasional clashes between parents and children are not uncommon, but when defiant behavior — such as tantrums, resistance to chores, and negativity — becomes chronic, it can cause big problems within the family. In 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child, child and family psychologist Dr. Jeff Bernstein has developed a ground-breaking 10-day program to help parents gain back control over their defiant child or teen. This powerful and exceptionally reader-friendly guide explains what causes defiance in kids, why it's so destructive to the family, and shows parents step-by-step how they can end the behavior.
Simple-to-follow and extremely effective, 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child will bring much-needed relief to the millions of frustrated parents out there living with defiant children.
Customer Reviews:
very helpful.......2007-10-05
While the author is a bit condescending towards parents, the book is helpful for developing tools for reducing defiance in children. Try it.....it seems to work.
Solid, sober, accurate advice.......2007-10-01
10 Days to a Less Defiant Child is a brilliant book, written by an author who has obvious experience dealing with defiant children and is written in an easy-to-read style. It's already made a huge difference with our seven-year-old son, and we've only just finished Day 3. Of course, like any "self help" book, this one requires changes in the parental "self." So be prepared to read carefully and put the advice to practice, both now and later. The rewards are worth the effort.
I'm a true believer.......2007-09-23
I didn't think this book would work. I read the other reviews before I purchased, and figured all I had to lose was the cash. I was already at the end of my rope. In one week, I cannot believe the change I see in my son! Don't let me fool you, we had to change too, my husband and myself, but omg the difference and the calm in our house is unbelievable, and I'm only on day 6 ! Well worth it. We spent thousands on a shrink and went no where. I spent less than $20 on this book!
Although my boys didn't grow halos in ten days..........2007-09-19
Although my boys didn't grow halos in ten days, I found this book to be very helpful in raising a very defiant six year old and his three year old brother who is beginning to copy his big brothers behavior. There were three points in the program that I was able to implement immediately: 1. Start listening to your child. 2. Stop the yelling. 3. Pick your battles.
I know the term "pick your battles" has been around forever, but the author really showed how to implement it. Staying calm and not yelling has kept my stress level much lower. Often my child is surprised when I ask him (calmly!) to explain why he is behaving inappropriately. It will often diffuse a full blown tantrum. This is the first book about defiant behavior that has given some help and hope.
Reassuring Guide to better parenting........2007-08-12
I feel better as a parent after reading Dr. Bernstein's book. But at times it is difficult in certain situations to adapt his philosphies to te real world. Maybe it takes practice and time. The book definetly identifies the triggers that increase negative behavior, which I found very helpful
Book Description
The perfect book to help you give your oppositional-defiant child the help he or she needs.
Customer Reviews:
Great Doable Parenting Skills.......2007-05-13
This book was a very easy read. It was very insightful and had a lot of useful information when dealing with a defiant child. All of the parenting advise was doable and very adaptive.
Informative Read.......2007-05-07
The descriptions of the ODD child's view of the world were quite insightful. I also liked the idea of holding children accountable for their actions, something that doesn't seem to happen enough. However, I have a feeling that most parents will balk at the extremes they will have to go to in order to get their child to change. They may intellectually understand what needs to be done, but if people had the stamina to enforce such consequences in the first place, there wouldn't be so many ODD children needing help. Still, a very informative book that I will recommend to others.
A must for raising teenagers.......2007-04-04
This book became my "bible" for raising my teenage daughter. All parents of teenagers should read this book!
GREAT PARENTING MANUAL FOR ODD CHILDREN.......2007-03-31
This is a fantastic book to help parents parent ODD kids. It is easy to use and the techniques work very quickly. If your house is in chaos because your kiddo has taken over and ruling the roost, this book will help you gain control again and YOUR SANITY.
Dealing with Defiant Teen........2007-03-31
I sent this book to my sister, and she found some of it helpful, but not all because of the unique situation she has with her teen. She has gotten a bit saturated with advice, which is not always so helpful.
Book Description
The six-year-old is a complex child, entirely different from the five-year-old. Though many of the changes are for the good -- Six is growing more mature, more independent, more daring and adventurous -- this is not necessarily an easy time for the little girl or boy. Relationships with mothers are troubled -- most of the time Six adores mother, but whenever things go wrong, it's her fault. It used to be, at Five, that she was the center of the child's universe; now, the child is the center of his own universe.
Parents need the expert advice of Drs. Ames and Ilg during this difficult year, to explain parent-child relations, friendships with peers, what six-year-olds excel at, how they see the world, what it feels like to be entering the first grade. Children need patience and understanding to help make this transition easier.
Customer Reviews:
I loved this book.......2007-08-30
This book was recommended to me by our pediatrician, and it helped me greatly. Like others have mentioned, there are some outdated references in the book, but it really doesn't matter. I found this book to be highly reassuring that most of the so-called crazy things my son had been doing are, in fact, normal six-year-old behavior. Reading this book is like having a chat with a wise, elderly relative. I am so grateful to the pediatrician for recommending it to me, and I have recommended it to countless other parents, all of whom love it too.
Fabulous, enlightening Book!.......2007-05-13
I recommend this book and any other in the series to those parents who want to know their children better. These books afford you the opportunity to view the world through your child's eyes and reassures you that he/she is on track and just "going through a phase"!
Well worth the read and the money!
Your Six-Year-Old: Loving and Defiant.......2007-05-13
I have read all of this series of books beginning with Your Two-Year-Old: Terrible or Tender by Louise Bates Ames and Frances L. Ilg. (The books start with the one-year-old.) Their insight into the characteristics, behavior, and development of children is awesome. It seems sometimes that my daughter changes overnight from a loving, caring child into a "monster." I then go back and re-read and find comfort as she goes through this difficult or demanding stage that it is all very "normal"--that other children behave in the same way. The techniques given are so helpful and have worked every time when addapted to my daughter's personality. Dr. Ames states very clearly in the Foreword of each book that "ever child is an individual, different in many ways from every other child living--even from his or her own idential twin," and that no child is truly "average." Techniques are so simple, but in the heat of the problem something hard to think of on my own. Because of the difference at which children reach certain stages, I recomment that each book be read before the child reaches the age of a certain book. I urge every parent of one-year-olds through fourteen-year-olds to read these books and keep them handy for quick reference.
Have never failed me yet..........2007-04-30
I found a few Gesell books in my MILs storage shed when my now [..]daughter was about three. I thought they were hilariously outdated, but read them anyway. However, they were DEAD on accurate about where she was developmentally and where she was going to be. Consistently, I found myself coming back to "You're Three Year Old" and "Your Four Year Old" and then finding and buying the other books as they went along.
Yes, much of the informations and attitudes are outdated, but understanding that some behaviors are age appropriate and better to deal with at another time is invaluable. Additionally, some advice never gets old.
My younger child is now about to be 6, and I've misplaced my books, but I value the information enough to buy it again.
Helpful but outdated.......2007-01-10
The number of references to nose drops was kind of comical. The number of references to the mom staying home and the dad trying to make a man of his boy was less comical. Overall, I found the information very helpful, but I felt like I was getting advice from my grandma or something. Reading this in conjunction with "The Brat Stops Here" have helped me feel much better about the way my 6-year-old behaves. I don't know if I'll buy the book about Sevens.
Book Description
Why is it that in the midst of a war, one can still find gardens? In the most brutal environments, both stateside and on the battlefield, they continue to flourish. Wartime gardens are dramatic examples of what Kenneth I. Helphand calls “defiant gardens” — gardens created in extreme social, political, economic, or cultural conditions. Illustrated with archival photos, this remarkable book examines gardens of war in the 20th century, including gardens built behind the trenches in World War I, in the Warsaw and other ghettos during World War II, and in Japanese-American internment camps, as well as gardens created by soldiers at their bases and encampments during wars in the Persian Gulf, Vietnam, and Korea. Proving that gardens are far more than peaceful respites from the outside world, Defiant Gardens is a thought-provoking analysis of why people create natural spaces.
Customer Reviews:
Inspirational.......2007-05-12
A review in the WSJ, caught my eye and I ordered this book. I sent "Defiant Gardens" directly to our daughter, who is currently in prison. Spoke with her today - this book is an inspiration. Women, other inmates, are lined up to read it after she's shared passages out loud with them...
She loved Nelson Mandela's words, "To plant a seed, watch it grow, to tend and then harvest it, offered a simple but enduring satisfaction. The sense of being the custodian of this small patch of earth offered a small taste of freedom."
Or from the quote about ghettos and camps,"These defiant gardens were an attempt to create a kind of peace in the midst of madness and order in the prevailing chaos."
Kenneth Helphand has hit the mark with his insight. We are donating Defiant Gardens to the prison library so his words can be enjoyed by those who might appreciate it the most.
Dig In And Read.......2007-01-04
Gardeners, Veterans, psychologists, sociologists, folks who have lived through an encampment or been a prisoner can appreciate this book. Keep a hankie close by. You will be a better person for having read this book. It repeatedly illustrated resilience in people of all ages and races. People like plants, want to live. Even if it is a daily struggle to survive, it is worth it to have another day. Read this book. You will be grateful.
Book Description
Every child has "ornery" moments, but more than 1 in 20 American children exhibit behavioral problems that are out of control. For readers struggling with an unyielding or combative child, YOUR DEFIANT CHILD: EIGHT STEPS TO BETTER BEHAVIOR offers the understanding and guidance they need. Drawing on Dr. Russell A. Barkley's many years of work with parents and children, the book clearly explains what causes defiance, when it becomes a problem, and how it can be resolved. The book's comprehensive eight-step program stresses consistency and cooperation, promoting changes through a system of praise, rewards, and mild punishment. Readers learn tools and strategies for establishing clear patterns of discipline, communicating with children on a level they can understand, and reducing family stress overall. Filled with helpful charts, questionnaires, and checklists, YOUR DEFIANT CHILD helps parents get their child's behavior back on track and restore harmony in the home.
Customer Reviews:
Excellent resource for parents.......2007-10-05
My pediatrician recommended this book when I expressed concerns over power struggles I was having with my daughter. Initially I took the book out of the library - then had to buy it because frankly - I can't do without it now.
Debra Brown: Your Defiant Child.......2007-07-26
I have found this book to be very helpful in dealing with one of my clients. It was in excellent shape as promised and I would purchase from this seller again.
EXCELLENT ADVICE.......2007-04-04
I'VE READ MANY BOOKS ON CHILDREN AND HOW TO HANDLE THEM. THIS WAS THE BEST BY FAR. IT IS AN EASY READ AND THE PROGRAM ABSOLUTELY WORKS, AS LONG AS YOU ARE CONSISTENT.
This book has changed our lives........2006-01-03
We recently took our 4 year old to a psychologist to be evaluated for social/emotional/behavior problems. He recommended that we implement a token economy system. While searching for information on token economy systems for kids, I stumbled upon this book. I liked that in addition to philosophical discussion about children with behavior problems it also gave you a ton of practical advice. I use this book as a manual. It has completely turned our 4 year around. I believe that if I had read it two years ago, we never would have seen these behavior problems. His advice is clear, simple, and works. Thank you Dr. Barkley!
Handle your child with love.......2005-05-18
I read the book in 2001. It has impressed me ever since. I have several books on this subject. I consider this book is the best.
The book provides you with the principles and methods to handle a very stubborn kid (but not the kid with a mental disorder).
For example, the biggest thing a kid needs is love. But what is love concretely? It is an attention. It is the time that we spend with the kid. But how to spend the time effectively? It is not by controlling him/her. It is by giving him/her the freedom to enjoy the time spent together.
I have not followed exactly the methods provided in the book, but the concept has been very useful for me to deal with my child.
Average customer rating:
- Great Clinical Reference Guide
- Fast and in excellent condition
- state-of-the-art
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Defiant Children, Second Edition: A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Parent Training
Russell A. Barkley
Manufacturer: The Guilford Press
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Similar Items:
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Defiant Teens: A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Family Intervention
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Your Defiant Child: Eight Steps to Better Behavior
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Evidence-Based Psychotherapies for Children and Adolescents
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Parent Management Training: Treatment for Oppositional, Aggressive, and Antisocial Behavior in Children and Adolescents
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Clinical Practice of Cognitive Therapy with Children and Adolescents: The Nuts and Bolts
ASIN: 1572301236 |
Book Description
This remarkably clear and effective manual includes a thorough clinical guide to Dr. Barkley's 10-session parent training program, an assessment section that incorporates DSM-IV diagnostic criteria, and reproducible materials reinforcing each step of the program.
Practitioners learn proven techniques for helping parents to:
* Understand their child's misbehavior
* Motivate their child and increase compliance
* Decrease disruptive behavior
*Establish proper disciplinary systems without corporal punishment
*Improve school behavior with a new home-based reward system
Designed in a convenient format with lay-flat binding for easy photocopying, the manual includes all needed assessment forms and parent and teacher handouts. Purchasers can photocopy the materials they need as often as they need without additional cost.
Customer Reviews:
Great Clinical Reference Guide.......2007-07-17
Prior to purchasing this book, I had read some excellent techniques that Dr. Barkley had recommended when working with children with ADHD. I then purchased this book and began implementing the books training program with the families that I work with. The thing that I appreciated about this book is the care the Dr. Barkely takes in educating the parents on ADHD, helping to improve the relationship between parent and child and then looking to implement a behavior plan to improve the childs acting out behaviors. By doing this, it provided a more comprehensive parent training plan rather than solely implementing a behavior modification plan. At times Dr. Barkley's explainations can be a little blunt which may put off some parents who are reading this as a self help guide. Otherwise, it is an exellent resource for those therapists needing clinical guidance in implementing an effective parental training program.
Fast and in excellent condition.......2005-09-23
The text was sent quickly to me and it was in excellent condition, as the seller reported.
state-of-the-art.......2000-02-27
Dr. Barkley's book (and the recently-published "Defiant Teens") is the current state-of-the-art treatment for oppositional-defiant children. I have used Dr. Barkley's methods with many families struggling to cope positively with an OD child. Our community frequently requests parenting workshops, and I always find myself turning to Barkley's works as a way to focus my presentations. There are many books for clinicians on this subject. For a research-based, instantly useable, positively-focused reference, buy this one.
Average customer rating:
- It's Sam & Alyssa's show
- 2nd book in a fabulous series
- The Defiant Hero
- Three romances for the price of one!
- It's Sam & Alyssa's show
|
The Defiant Hero
Suzanne Brockmann
Manufacturer: Ivy Books
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Mass Market Paperback
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The Unsung Hero (Seal Team 16, Book 1)
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Over the Edge
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Out of Control
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Into the Night
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Gone Too Far
ASIN: 0804119538
Release Date: 2001-02-27 |
Book Description
In The Unsung Hero, award-winning author Suzanne Brockmann dazzled readers with her remarkable cast of tough and tender U.S. Navy SEALs. Now her daring men in uniform return for THE DEFIANT HERO—a thrilling novel of steadfast courage, intimate passions, and the profound risks that are taken in the name of love. . . .
"The United States refuses to negotiate with terrorists." Meg Moore remembered the warning from her job as a translator in a European embassy. Those same words will spell out a death sentence for her daughter and grandmother who have been kidnapped by a lethal group called the Extremists. Meg will do anything to meet their unspeakable demands; anything—even kill—to save her child.
When Navy SEAL Lieutenant, junior grade, John Nilsson is summoned to Washington, D.C., by the FBI to help negotiate a hostage situation, the last person he expects to see holding a foreign ambassador at gunpoint is Meg. He hasn't seen her in years, but he's never forgotten how it feels to hold her in his arms. John could lose his career if he helps her escape. She will lose her life if he doesn't. . . .
Customer Reviews:
It's Sam & Alyssa's show.......2007-01-05
I really disliked this book. If it wasn't for Sam & Alyssa's story, the one "true saving grace" of this tired-awful book, I would have given it 1 star.
The plot: Meg's ten year old daughter and grandmother are kidnapped by terrorists. They threaten to kill Meg's daughter and grandmother if she doesn't comply with their wishes. They want her to kill or bring them one of their extremist opposers. She kidnaps this guy and decides to turn him in to the terrorists or kill him herself.
Completely unbelievable. This small, slight woman is able to drug and drag around a grown man? NOT!! Plus, Meg doesn't care who she kills or hurts to get her daughter back. It was terrible. It gave her some rather unlikable character traits. I found myself not caring what happened to Meg, her grandmother or her daughter. She is completely unpatriotic. I could not figure out what John found so attractive about her. He's a Navy Seal. This is a man who puts his life on the line for his country. Would he really want to be with a woman who is completely nuts? I don't think so.
I have read four of the Seal Team 16 books. I started with the SEAL team 16 books out of order. This probably was not a good idea, as I was left with much questions about prior characters that were mentioned. However, once I got into the books, (especially Sam & Alyssa)the books started to make more sense to me. While this was not one of my favorites in the series, it is still worthy of a read.
2nd book in a fabulous series.......2006-07-07
This one was book 2 in the Navy SEALS Team 16 series.
And I gotta say, I'm getting really attached to this series. The characters are awesome, as are the storylines and the romances. And I love that even after (or before) characters have their own book, they are big parts of the others. They don't just slink off into the post-book netherworld as happens in some series'.
This one is about SEAL John Nilsson and a woman named Meg Moore. Years before the book occurred, they'd met and become friends. They wanted more, but she was married, but separated. So they never got together and hadn't seen each other in three years. Meg works as a linguist and does translations for a lot of government stuff. A terrorist group kidnaps her daughter and grandmother and forces Meg to take an opposing terrorist hostage, telling her that if she brings the man to them, she'll get her family back. She goes to John for help. The book is then about how they go about getting her daughter and grandmother.
There isn't a lot of direct romance in this one. The actual plot is a main part of the focus, but even so, the characters are clearly connected and you don't really feel left out in the romance front. That kinda is helped by two of the sub-characters, Alyssa and Sam, who have this love-hate thing going - they are actually the main pairing in book 6. So you end up really interested in what's going on with them. And like the other books, this one also has it's bits of historical scenes. As before, for a while I'm like, what do I care? I dont' want to read this, the other stuff is so much more interesting. But then you get drawn into the story of the past that is being told in bits and pieces, and by the end, you want to know the conclusion to that part as well.
All in all, good book. I'm dying to read the next one. So many great, inter-twining storylines that are weaved through all the books.
Rating: 3.5 / 5
The Defiant Hero.......2006-03-04
This book was another chapter in the seal teams series
Ms Brockmann has created. I enjoyed it. I like the
characters she has created and the secondary stories she co-mingles with the modern story. She combines the mild thriller with romance and makes it enjoyable. Great escapist reading.
Three romances for the price of one!.......2005-08-29
The second in the SEAL Team Sixteen series, "The Defiant Hero," manages to capture and maintain tension and action-packed suspense with each turn of the page. The characters literally jump from the page to capture your attention.
Widow Meg Moore is forced by terrorists to kidnap a foreign national in exchange for her daughter and grandmother, who they are holding captive. Knowing that it is a hopeless situation, Meg tells the hostage negotiators that the only negotiator she will even consider talking to is John Nilsson, a Navy SEAL that she met while on a foreign assignment. John has carried a torch for Meg for many years, but has not acted on his feelings since she was married at the time.
No one is more surprised than John when he is called to negotiate. The Meg he remembers would never do anything so suicidal. A linguistics expert, the two manage to communicate via a language no one else recognizes, and she reveals the fate of her family. When all is not what it appears, and Meg spirits away her prey to barter for her family, John is quickly on her tail, trying to win her trust and help her out of the mess.
"The Defiant Hero" also marks the consummation of the love-hate relationship between SEAL Lt. Sam Starrett and FBI Agent Alyssa Locke, which plays out over the next several installments in the series. This relationship is so complex, it is no wonder that it plays out over several books.
I could have lived without reading the third romance - a WWII flashback involving Meg's grandmother. These WWII flashbacks appear to be a recurring theme in several of the SEAL Sixteen books. After this one, I tended to skip the flashbacks in all later books, since they did little to move the plot along.
It's Sam & Alyssa's show.......2004-07-30
I really disliked this book. If it wasn't for Sam & Alyssa's story, the one "true saving grace" of this tired-awful book, I would have given it 1 star.
The plot: Meg's ten year old daughter and grandmother are kidnapped by terrorists. They threaten to kill Meg's daughter and grandmother if she doesn't comply with their wishes. They want her to kill or bring them one of their extremist opposers. She kidnaps this guy and decides to turn him in to the terrorists or kill him herself.
Completely unbelievable. This small, slight woman is able to drug and drag around a grown man? NOT!! Plus, Meg doesn't care who she kills or hurts to get her daughter back. It was terrible. It gave her some rather unlikable character traits. I found myself not caring what happened to Meg, her grandmother or her daughter. She is completely unpatriotic. I could not figure out what John found so attractive about her. He's a Navy Seal. This is a man who puts his life on the line for his country. Would he really want to be with a woman who is completely nuts? I don't think so.
Plus the World War II story was a drag. Why bother? It was a waste of time and paper. Both Ms. Brockmann's and myself.
I find myself wondering what the hype is about Suzanne Brockmann. I have read four of the Seal Team 16 books, or rather tortured myself to read them. I later realize it is because I am trying to find out more about Sam & Alyssa's history. I first learned about them in "Wildcart Karmody's" story and have been reading the books in reverse sequential order to discover more about them. I have ordered Sam & Alyssa's story and truly believe that this will be my last Suzanne Brockmann book. Her love scenes are drab, her plots disjointed and with three to four storylines running consecutively, usually just plain confusing.
Suzanne, I'm truly disappointed.
Average customer rating:
- Defiant Teens:A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Family
|
Defiant Teens: A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Family Intervention
Russell A. Barkley ,
Gwenyth H. Edwards , and
Arthur L. Robin
Manufacturer: The Guilford Press
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Defiant Children, Second Edition: A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Parent Training
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Helping the Noncompliant Child, Second Edition: Family-Based Treatment for Oppositional Behavior
ASIN: 1572304405 |
Book Description
This authoritative manual presents an 18-step program designed both to teach parents the skills they need to manage difficult adolescent behavior and to improve family relationships overall. The first nine steps of the program modify the approach presented in Russell A. Barkley's DEFIANT CHILDREN, SECOND EDITION, to focus on developmental concerns of adolescence. The authors delineate clear procedures for assessing defiance in teens and working with parents, alone or in groups, to reverse problem behavior. Steps 10 through 18 are conducted with parents and teenagers together, utilizing a proven family therapy model developed by Arthur L. Robin and Sharon Foster. Clinicians are shown how to help all family members learn to negotiate, communicate, and problem-solve more effectively, while facilitating adolescents' individuation and autonomy. Featuring a lay-flat binding for ease of photocopying, the book includes reproducible forms that enable clinicians to gauge the nature, diversity, and severity of parent/n-/adolescent conflicts; assess for oppositional defiant disorder (ODD); and evaluate parental psychological adjustment. Reproducible handouts for families reinforce crucial ideas and skills imparted in-session.
Customer Reviews:
Defiant Teens:A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Family.......2000-05-07
Defiant Teens: A Clinician's Manual for Assessment and Family Intervention is a very practical book for clinician's who work with teens with behavior disorders. It combines the best elements of behavioral therapy without ignoring the crucial role the family plays in treatment.
The book begins by presenting a comprehensive model for teen behavior, which includes discussion of mental disorders, parenting, and developmental factors. Then it describes instructions for 18 structured sessions that are used to treat the family and adolescent. It includes handouts, which may be reproduced if you buy the book.
I have used this book in practice as a substance abuse counselor in a correctional facility and found it to be very useful. It is a valuable resource for anyone working with difficult to treat teens and their families.
The best part of this book is that it is written like a workbook. Unlike many books on the matter, it includes step-by-step instructions that are grounded in theory without putting you to sleep. The handouts and session descriptions can be adapted and added to a clinician's toolbox. I would recommend this book to anyone who treats adolescents.
Book Description
Addresses, in a concrete, practical way, how to deal with disruptive, troubled youth. Emphasis is placed on diffusing resistance to change and facilitating treatment compliance.
Customer Reviews:
Angry, And Perhaps Rightly So.......2003-01-04
Dr. Neil Bernstein's useful work on the counseling of oppositional teenagers is noteworthy in its humility, for a start. Clinical success, in the author's view, is established the old fashioned way: you have to work for it. In his introduction Bernstein confesses to a basic distrust of quick fixes for teenage problems, particularly those promulgated on the lecture/workshop circuit. He keeps a balanced head on the etiology of oppositional defiance, recognizing that disorders of mood, substance abuse, and dysfunctional families of origin, to name a few factors, must be given their day in court during the diagnostic phase of treatment. He is well read in adolescent development and recognizes that the teen years are inherently about distancing and defiance, in some way, shape, or form.
If one were to label the author's clinical approach, perhaps the Rogerian style comes closest to capturing this practitioner's persona. Without losing sight of the nuts and bolts, Bernstein seems to find his success in establishing empathy and trust with his young clients. The "opposition" of teenagers is directed against the systems that they perceive as having failed them: family, school, and the peer community. The defensive attitude of such youth is both a mask for their pain and insurance against further hurt. It is encouraging to see that a lengthy chapter has been devoted to family intervention [though some family specialists will inevitably argue that the family organism is the whole enchilada where childhood disorders are concerned.]
Bernstein's clinical examples-and they are numerous-appear to be drawn primarily from individual therapy sessions, i.e., without parents or others in the process. If this reflects the demographics of his paying clientele, then he must have a remarkable gift for developing engagement with his young clients, and he would apparently have enough leisure to plumb his clients' psyches at a pace that does not engender defensiveness. But aside from the wearisome issue of whether managed health care or the client's own limited resources put limitations on a style that calls for protracted contact and trust building, the one nagging question left hanging in this work is the role of the parents in the client's treatment. In Chapter 12 the author provides a substantive commentary on family therapy, noting among other things that parents frequently repeat the mistakes of their own mothers and fathers, implying that many oppositional clients have plenty at home to be oppositional about. Is such therapy without the parents the clinical equivalent of rowing with one oar? I would summarize Bernstein's position on parental participation in therapy as "optimal but not necessary." As a practitioner myself, unless I have compelling reasons to the contrary, I subscribe to the philosophy of the seasoned general who brought a long time rival into his inner circle on the grounds that "I'd rather have him inside my tent [urinating] out than outside my tent [urinating] in." Somewhat surprising to me is the desire of many of my ODD clients to have a parent in therapy with them, perhaps their way of telling me why they are so angry.
In the final analysis, this is a work from the traditional psychoanalytic school that extols the time proven methods of human respect and client interaction. It is an excellent didactic exposition, an opportunity for a practitioner to ask himself, "Do I sound like that?" There is an abundance of common sense and a minimum of psycho-jargon that makes this work accessible to teachers and many parents as well.
Treating the Unmanageable Adolescent.......2000-12-09
I've been working with difficult teenagers for over ten years and read this book hoping to gain new insights and skills into working with this population. By far, it is the best book I have ever read on this topic. It is explicit, practical, and offers numerous suggestions for addressing the multiple problems that this population faces. I have found it extremely useful in my practice because of the easily applicable techniques Dr. Bernstein presents, and his concrete suggestions about how to implement them. Dr. Bernstein shares many examples from his clinical practice which parents and clinicians alike should find helpful. Susan Gordon, Ph.D.
an excellent guide to practical management.......1999-02-21
I was startled to read an earlier online review of this book becasue it was so much at varience with my own thoughts about Dr. Bersteins book. I am a psycholgist with a Ph.D. and 25 years experience working in clinical settings and I have never before encountered a book on conduct disorders that was so clearly the work of an experienced clinician and so deeply rooted in his experience. Bernstein's clinical examples could have come from my office or those of other psychologists I know and work with. His suggestions and illlustrations of his work with his patients was both reassuring and familiar as well as stimulating and provocative. If you chave to go out and work in the trenches with oppositional and conduct disordered, Dr. Bernstien's book is a very handy item to have along
A disappointing cursory treatment of the disorder.......1998-09-19
I purchased Dr. Bernstein's book as part of some fact finding for my master's thesis in Special Education. I did not expect the book to have all the answers, but was hopeful that there would be a good body of information that would prove helpful.
I was very disappointed. I found the introductory chapters to be a cursory tratment of the disruptive disorders. Seldom was there a delineation between conduct problems and normal development. There was little information of how antisocial behavior differentiates from conduct disorder. There were many blanket statements that were not sufficiently supported with evidence. The case studies were one sided, and I believe, not fully representative of the intracies of the personalities of children.
I was particularly dismayed at the suggestion that the population of conduct disordered children was "likely to have a narrow range of interests" and spending a few minutes a week glancing through "People" and "Rolling Stone" was a sufficient way to be informed of their culture. The greatest disservice to these children is to take their minds for granted in such a way.
As for the information on the theraputic process and treatment, I did not find this helpful. Most of the principles discussed here are presented in a great book, "The Skilled Helper" by Gerard Egan. A book which takes a much more compassionate, humble approach to the helping process.
I had hopes for this book. I went into it with an open mind, willing to learn. I was bitterly disappointed with it's myopic approach to this population of special needs children and youth. I could not recommend it even as an introduction to the subject.
Book Description
Change Your Child's Life! Turn Negative Behavior into Positive Traits
How do you deal with a difficult and defiant child or teenager? What can you do if your child has been diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) or is resentful and constantly in trouble at school? Are there constructive ways to channel such oppositional energy and determination? Dr. John F. Taylor will tell you how.
Inside, you'll find new hope and hundreds of specific, sensible, and easy-to-implement suggestions for improving life with a rebellious and argumentative child. Parents and teachers — anyone who deals with difficult children, teens, or young adults — will also learn how to tap the potential of these natural-born leaders by discovering how to:
·Understand why an oppositional attitude exists
·Open up new, safer avenues for children to express needs and wants
·Enhance communication, avoid common mistakes, and reduce undesirable behavior
·Teach a child conscience-based self-control
·And much more!
Customer Reviews:
Not Useful. Misleading Title........2007-02-15
Misleading title. I had to put this book down 1st time I picked it up. You see he told me I was the problem then proceeded to only offer solutions to fix my family. No case studies, no references to previous solutions, no suggestions from immediate help. Nope, ODD children are created by the parents. Hogwash.
I'm sick and tired of "professionals" telling me that my child isn't the one who is bringing in the problem to my family. That it's me and my misguided attempts to thwart his behavior constitute abuse.
Here's how I see it. My child needs help. We need help. We need real tools to quickly deal with his problems so we can get to the other side and start to deal with the complex issues a ODD child creates in the family. The way I see it is if you're here looking for help, your not abusive - you need support. What kind of support is it to be told from the start you're the problem. Your desperate and in need of immediate solutions. Not told to take your wife on a picnic, go to the movies or on vacation. You need suggested actions based on real life scenarios.
Don't buy this book unless you need to be told you're the problem. Which your not. It's not your fault - especially if your here looking for solutions.
Very helpfull.......2007-01-23
I found that this book gave me alot of very good advice. I would recomend this book to anyone who has a child that doesn't respond well to disapline, or instructions.
Important wake up call for parents.......2005-10-30
I work with children that have every problem you can imagine and my own issues with one of my own children. It is always the parents that desire to have an outsider "fix" the child, feeling that it is the child who is at fault. Parents that cannot take a good close look in the mirror and embrace the messages that this book exposes and details will miss an opportunity to turn their family around, and really help themselves while helping their child. It is not about blaming but about honesty, and how to correct beliefs and patterns that may have been handed down from old generations that don't work so well in our current life-style. I found the book to be a worthwhile one among other resources to become informed and WORK on all of us.
Helpful? Ha........2005-01-25
The gist of this book is that if your child is defiant, it must be because you, the parent, is too controlling. Give the child what he wants and quit bugging him.
Um, no. Has this author ever spent any time with a defiant preschooler? If I didn't try to control him somewhat, he'd spend most of his life naked in front of the tv eating cookies. This book was no help at all.
Never mind my child-- now I'M angry and defiant!.......2004-12-14
Believe me, any parent dealing with the angry, defiant, discouraged child will gladly plunk down the $15.95 for the "real solutions for transformation" promised by Taylor. Only problem is, 1/4 of the way into the book, it becomes evident that Taylor soundly believes that YOU are your child's most severe problem, and YOU must be "fixed" as quickly as possible to heal your child. Your child suffers only from fear, which coincidentally, you just so happened to have created in your child. HOGWASH! This quackery harkens back to the days when autism was blamed on the mother's inability to "fully bond" with the child. We know better now, yet thousands of families suffered needlessly in the process. Gee- this is something new coming from the psychiatric community-- we don't know what in the world is wrong with these children, so, hey LET'S BLAME THE PARENTS!! When we're done with the scapegoating, let's drug the little devils as well. That'll solve the problem. At least it'll keep 'em quiet in the movie theater.
DO NOT BUY THIS BOOK. The damage done could be far worse than the $15.95 you've wasted.
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The Defiant Child: A Parent's Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder
The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children
Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child : Eliminating Conflict by Establishing Clear, Firm, and Respectful Boundaries
Transforming the Difficult Child
