Bill, the Galactic Hero: The Final Incoherent Adventure! (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Average customer rating:

Harrison Doesn't Know When to Stop

funny stuff on paper.

Funny, satiric look at the Gulf War through the eyes of Bill

Bill, the Galactic Hero: The Final Incoherent Adventure! (Bill, the Galactic Hero)
Harry Harrison , and David Harris
Manufacturer: Avon Books (Mm)
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Harrison, Harry | ( H ) | Authors, A-Z | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
General | Science Fiction | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
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Bill, the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Ten Thousand Bars (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Bill, the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Tasteless Pleasure (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Bill the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Zombie Vampires (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Bill, the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Bottled Brains

Bill the Galactic Hero

ASIN: 0380756676

Book Description

BILL - the army's made him what he is today - the perfect Starship Trooper, proud possessor of two right arms and a lockerful of feet suitable for every occasion.

BILL - this time he really put his foot (the Swiss-Army one with the special attachments, secret compartments, collapsible mess-kit and condom-dispenser) right in it.

BILL's been volunteered to join a suicide squad run by Captain Cadaver to the well-known hell-hole planet of Eyerack. The orders are DEATH OR GLORY - and GLORY made a point of never returning the invitation to the war. So. Can this really be IT. The Long Goodbye? Zero Hour? Harmonicas at dawn? The end of a brilliantly undistinguished career of military mishaps? What can I tell you?

This IS BILL's final incoherent adventure!

Customer Reviews:

Harrison Doesn't Know When to Stop.......2001-12-11

The first "Bill" book was good. Not great, but decent, funny and satirically sharp. The rest of the series is barely-mitigated garbage. By this point, he's clearly not even writing the stuff at all, as one "co-author" after another takes over. Sadly, it's difficult to see how it would be any better if he had. Harrison can write great, lively, funny, inventive sci-fi: the early "Rat" books, "Deathworld". "Deathworld" works so well because he wrote three short books, one short story and then stopped (or converted its protagonist into the Rat, one could argue). But the Rat books decay into a muddle when it becomes clear that Harrison just thrives on the stock elements of the stories; the capers, gadgets and booze. Continuity and development can go hang. Who cares if English was the native language of Jim diGriz's homeworld in some books but has to learn it in others? Who cares that the man who has dealt with money in every form from coin to electronic transfer can suddenly be confused by a wallet and its contents? Stick with the ride and it'll all work out OK. The Rat character and the main ingredients are good enough. After a while, though, the contempt that Harrison exudes for his audience starts to get wearing. If Harrison doesn't care enough to keep consistent about basic details of his major character's history, why should we care about him at all?

But with "Bill", we reach this point after Book 1. The character is not as accessible, his lot in life not as enjoyable to read about, the reversals he suffers tiresome. Add in some often appallingly bad attempts at genre parody (the Cyberpunk and Orson Scott Card efforts in one of this series, in particular, were cringe-makingly horrible) and it's no surprise that in every used SF bookstore I've seen, a chunk of the Harry Harrison shelfspace is taken by barely-touched copies of "Bill the Galactic Hero And Something Or Other" by Harry Harrison And Some Guy. I've read them all once and will never touch any of them again. Harrison clearly doesn't care about Bill, and nor do I.

funny stuff on paper........2001-10-23

Harry Harrison has an ingenius talent when it comes to creating fundamentally likeable,amusing characters and scenarios.Similar to sleeeepery jeeeeem digriz(anti-hero of the stainless steel rat series)Bill is stuck in the TROOPERS and all his adventures revolve around trying to get out and back to his sepia-toned robomule.The final adventure is more topical than previous novels but is firmly rooted in the soil of mirth with running gags,polevaulting gags and gags on rocket powered rollerblades(both left footed,chuckle chuckle chuckle)ah bejesus,this was my 'bath book' for ages,like a fine wine in nearly no way at all except its funnier.buy this for a much needed laugh at the military mind.

Funny, satiric look at the Gulf War through the eyes of Bill.......1996-09-30

Harris and Harrison have taken their Galactic Hero into the middle of a war for control of vital neutron mines. This book takes Bill back to satiric vision created by Harrison in the original book, Bill the Galatic Hero. Funny, occasionally moving, with an undercurrent of contemporary commentary on the nature of war--and people who like their jokes well-aged.

Average customer rating:

Gently tongue-in-cheek anti-military sarcasm of the 60's
Farewell to Arms? Maybe just the left...
A VERY AMUSING SCI-FI WINNER
Bitingly funny Sci-Fi Classic grows more relevant each year.
Terry Pratchett fans - this is the beginning

Bill, the Galactic hero
Harry Harrison
Manufacturer: Avon
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Unknown Binding

General | Science Fiction | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0380471833

Book Description

It was the highest honor to defend the Empire against the dreaded Chingers, an enemy race of seven-foot-tall lizards. But Bill, a Technical Fertilizer Operator from a planet of farmers, wasn't interested in honor-he was only interested in two things: his chosen career, and the shapely curves of Inga-Maria Calyphigia. Then a recruiting robot shanghaied him with knockout drops, and he came to in deep space, aboard the Empire warship Christine Keeler. And from there, things got even worse.

Customer Reviews:

Gently tongue-in-cheek anti-military sarcasm of the 60's.......2007-04-24

Strange, how I had never heard of Bill the Galactic Hero, until I surfed my way by accident to this book one day. I knew of Harry Harrison and had read his "Stainless Steel Rat" and several of his short stories years ago. As a youth, I read mostly what was stocked on the bookshelves of the Dallas public libraries, and this sort of literature was probably not considered worthy, and so never crossed my consciousness.

In many ways, the book's humor is reminiscent of the style of that other 60's era book "Bored of the Rings" (another book that did not make an appearance in the Dallas public libraries, but which I discovered along with the National Lampoon, and other great humor, through a roommate in college).

It's a silly, gentle sort of parody, not the dark, tear into shreds, profanity laced, edgy sort of stuff that we get so much today.

Bill is a farmboy in an outlying planet of the Empire, studying to be a Technical Fertilizer Operator, when he is literally drug-gooned into the Imperial Star Troopers. And thus begins a series of misadventures where Bill becomes a fuse tender (his job is to change the large fuses when they blow under the stresses of battle) on board the spaceship Christine Keeler (I had forgotten this one and had to look it up - Christine Keeler was the call girl who brought down the British Secretary of War John Profumo in 1961 in a sex scandal), and almost by accident becomes a hero, loses a left arm in a space battle, gets the right arm of one of his buddies transplanted so that he has TWO right arms....etc....

You get the idea.

All in all, a fast read and an amusing story, and a reminder of the gentle humor of the 1960's.

Farewell to Arms? Maybe just the left..........2005-09-12

I have a long history with Bill the Galactic Hero, but it took me two decades to read it. Stick with me; this is relevant to the review.

I first saw Bill the Galactic Hero in my local Waldenbooks as a teen in the `80s. I had spiked hair and wore parachute pants. I laughed out loud after flipping through some of the chapters and decided that I would buy it. When I went to purchase it, I suddenly realized I didn't have enough money. So I put it back, determined to buy it later.

When I walked past the shop clerk, I was accosted. He asked me to empty my pockets. He thought I was stealing books (STEALING BOOKS!). I was horrified and furious. And no, I didn't steal anything. But I sure as heck wasn't going to give that store my money.

Two decades passed and I forgot just about everything about the book, including the title. I just knew the character had a generic name and was really messed up--something was wrong with his arms. Then one day, while browsing Amazon.com, I stumbled across Bill the Galactic Hero. I put it on my wish list and one year later Bill and I were reacquainted.

What's even more interesting is that I live in Harry Harrison's place of birth, Stamford, CT. I'm not sure if I should be proud or if Harry should be concerned.

Anyway, I learned a few things right away about Bill the Galactic Hero, just by judging the book by its cover. None of the artists commissioned to create the covers actually read the book. How do I know this? Because I read the frickin' thing. Take a look: http://www.iol.ie/~carrollm/hh/n06-1-thumbs.htm

The cover I have shows Chingers (the "bad" guys) as seven-inch tall lizards with ray guns. Only in the book, they have four arms, not two. Poor Bill does end up with two right arms, but they are NOT on the same side (one cover gives Bill two left arms AND puts them on the wrong side). We know this because of one of the funniest lines in the entire book. I'll let you decide for yourself when you read it.

But I'm getting ahead. The plot takes place in a far future where robots are plentiful and people use a fake curse word for everything ("bowb"). Basically, Bill is a naive farm boy on a rural planet who gets forcibly pressed into military service. He ends up being a "fusetender," trained to change out fuses on a gigantic spaceship that he has never actually seen the outside of. In fact, Bill doesn't know anything about ship-to-ship combat and instead has to interpret what's going on by temperature changes in the room. When the shields go up, it stops everything from going in and out--including heat--such that the fuestenders strip down just to survive the sweltering temperatures. That slight rumble in the deck plates? That's a torpedo firing. You get the picture.

This is probably the most interesting part of the book, as we see war as it truly is...boring, interspersed by horrifying moments of sheer terror. Despite the fact that Bill isn't on the front lines (and in a space war, where ARE the front lines?), he's still at risk of dying. Which leads up to how Bill loses his left arm and gains an additional right arm. It's a lot funnier than it sounds.

The plot spirals from there. Unfortunately, the book's not as engaging when Bill is away from the military. Harrison is at his excoriating best when he's blasting the jaded, backstabbing, monotonous culture that is military bureaucracy. Bill learns fast and we learn with him: War is hell, and then you lose a limb. And get it replaced with one that doesn't fit right.

That said, the book is harsh on its characters. Just about everyone Bill meets, even those characters that seem to have an actual plot significance, die at the drop of a hat. They get blown up, immolated, shot, beaten to death, or eaten by a snake. Bill's world is brutal, but it moves so fast that you might have difficulty caring about who is who.

There's quite a bit of real science interspersed throughout the humor, especially the ridiculous problems of waste disposal on planet Helior. When I described the problems to my wife (an environmental studies major), she pointed out that the book must have been written in the `60s. It never occurred to me that the book was that old, but sure enough, checking the originally copyright confirmed that Bill the Galatic Hero was written at a time when the draft was in full effect and most people couldn't conceive of any possible future that didn't end in a natural or man-made holocaust. Bill the Galactic Hero is truly a product of its times.

But it's still pretty funny.

Ultimately, the book ends on an extremely sour, angry note. By then, Bill's transformation is complete. The number of sequels that came afterwards surprised me. Bill the Galactic Hero was written with a point in mind: that the military is a horrible place. Once Harrison got that point across (and believe you me, he gets it across), you have to wonder where he will take Bill next.

I imagine I would have appreciated this book much more if I was in the military or a teenager. In either case, it was certainly an educational experience for my inner writer. For anyone who wants to glorify war (Harrison's looking at you, Heinlein) in word, song or deed, Bill the Galactic Hero will shamelessly mock them until they change their mind.

And if not, well they were stupid bowbs anyway.

A VERY AMUSING SCI-FI WINNER.......2005-08-10

I once met a woman in a bookstore who was in the process of buying Harry Harrison's 1965 classic "Bill, the Galactic Hero." She told me that she'd read it many times already, and that it was the funniest book ever. Well, I've never forgotten that conversation, and had long been meaning to ascertain whether or not this woman was right. It took me almost 20 years to get around to this book, but having just finished "Bill, the Galactic Hero," I must say that, well, it IS very amusing indeed. In it, we meet Bill (no last name is ever provided), a simple farm lad on Phigerinadon II, who is shanghaied into the galactic emperor's army to fight in the war against the lizardlike Chingers. And what a grueling odyssey Bill goes through before all is said and done! He experiences a boot camp from hell, serves aboard the starship Christine Keeler and is almost killed, gets lost on the planetwide city of Helior, becomes a sanitation man, a revolutionary, a spy, fights on a swamp planet that's almost as nasty as Harrison's original Deathworld, and on and on. Harrison keeps this short novel moving along furiously, and the level of invention is very high throughout. It is most impressive how just about every page features some amusing incident, laff-out-loud line (and I am not an easy person to make laugh out loud) or imaginative detail. The story is a very violent one, a scathing commentary on the madness that is war and the crazy institution that is the military, and part of the story's humor comes from the joking, nonchalant manner in which horrible proceedings are described. But there is much that is just inherently flat-out funny: The characters drink Heroin Cola and eat chlora-fillies (part chlorophyll, part horse wieners). There's a rock band called The Coleoptera (beetles). The combatants use flintlock ray guns. There is a Robot Underground Resistance (RUR!), and some characters are named Schmutzig von Dreck (I guess it helps if you know some Yiddish), Gill O'Teen and Eager Beager. Still, as I said, this is a brutal tale, and the reader would be well advised not to grow too attached to any character, as at least half the cast gets offed before the book is through. And that brutalization extends to our main man Bill, who becomes less naive and more animallike as the novel proceeds. This is a tale told with almost Alfred Bester-like panache and marvelous satiric detail, but at times the detail is a bit sketchy; I'm referring to details of geography here, and background history and character. With so many incidents to cram into the book's short length, many of them seem a bit rushed, and characters come and go without leaving much of an impression. I suppose what I'm saying is that Harrison might have expanded his book a bit; that it's almost too concise and to the point. Still, the story certainly does entertain. But getting back to that woman in the bookstore...IS this the funniest book that I've ever read? Well, I must admit that no book has ever made me laff more than John Kennedy Toole's "A Confederacy of Dunces" (1980), and that Kurt Vonnegut's "The Sirens of Titan" (1959) may be a worthier sci-fi comedy than this one, but "Bill..." certainly does hold its own in that august company. After all, any book that provides big laffs and a positive message isn't to be sneezed at...

Bitingly funny Sci-Fi Classic grows more relevant each year........2004-05-21

You don't have to be a science fiction fan to like this book. There are no long, technical discussions of imaginary future technologies nor does the human race become different than it is now. What this book does as well or better than any other book is provide hilarious commentary on war and government as it follows the adventures of an everyman named Bill as he is drafted, sent to war, lied to, cheated and abused by every institution and bureacrat he comes in contact with. (Kind of reminds you of modern-day civilization, doesn't it?)

The simple plot follows a farm laborer named Bill as he is tricked into joining the army in a future inter-galactic war. I first read this book as a teen-ager and loved it though of course the military and the government were really our friends and not run by nut-cases concerned only with their own advancement as in the book. Well, re-reading this 30 years later after 4 years active duty and 5 in the reserves (They don't tell you that you can never leave the military if your specialty is needed when you try to resign) I find that this "satire" is a lot closer to the real military than almost any sincere book you can think of. Almost every ridiculously improbable military event in the book reminded me of similar real-life occurrences I participated in or heard about.

All in all, this book is entertaining and forces you to laugh even as identical monstrously wrong things happen in your own life. And, in case you're wondering, Bill does not triumph over the system, but ends up one more victim of bureaucracy and civilization.

Terry Pratchett fans - this is the beginning.......2004-04-05

I went to a Terry Pratchett book signing, and during the Q & A he mentioned that reading Bill The Galactic Hero forever altered the way he looked at fiction. I got a used copy and had high hopes for the laughs to come.

Boy, did they! Harry Harrison turns so many outworn cliches of science fiction and rocket pulp on their ear you'll get a crick in your neck. I laughed regularly through the whole thing, with some really good ones in the middle.

BTGH is the story of a backwoods farmboy who is shanghaied into military service because he looks just the type - big and strong, but dumber than a plant. During his training period, however, we find that our hero is quicker to notice things that we expected, and learns valuable lessons that are easily applicable to life, especially if you have a job you hate. To wit:

1) Shut up.
2) When the going gets tough, it'll get worse.
3) Never, ever, ever volunteer.
4) and Shut up.

Bill is slung through various attempts on his life in the course of military service, is awarded hero status, then promptly criminalized for missing his transport (because he gets lost, and there's a map, it's a long story) and gets wrapped up in a secret organization trying to take over the government, but he's working for the government as an informant, and all he really wants to do is get back to being a Fertilizer technician.

And I didn't even mention the war with the Chingers.

This book is a very quick read, and very entertaining, and required reading for any Terry Pratchett fan. I gave it four stars, beacuse it's the first in a series, and I really dislike having to read books in order, especially if there's more than two. But if you like your fiction with a good satiric twist, and non-stop, panic-addled action, find a used copy like I did, and give Bill the Galactic Hero a try.

Average customer rating:

One of the best Bill books out there

What do people see in this book?

Nothing quite like a Galactic hero

Bill is the best hero ever!

Bill The Greatest Galactic Hero Ever!

Bill the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Zombie Vampires (Bill, the Galactic Hero)
Harry Harrison
Manufacturer: Avon Books (Mm)
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Vampires | Horror | Genre Fiction | Literature & Fiction | Subjects | Books
Harrison, Harry | ( H ) | Authors, A-Z | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
General | Fantasy | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
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Bill, the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Tasteless Pleasure (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Bill, the Galactic Hero: The Final Incoherent Adventure! (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Bill, the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Bottled Brains

Bill, the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Ten Thousand Bars (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Bill the Galactic Hero

ASIN: 038075665X

Book Description

BILL - the perfect Starship Trooper: big, brawny, and brainwashed. Possessor of two right arms (impressive when it comes to saluting) and a foot that is threatening to turn into something more suited to being an umbrella stand than anything that could be squeezed into a size 11 sneaker.

BILL - a perfect recruit for the good ship Bounty, bound for the Chinger war and carrying a cargo of as nice a company of homicidal misfits and maniacs as you could wish to meet outside of a penitentiary asylum (which is where they've just come from).

BILL, THE GALACTIC HERO - he's back, he's bad and about to meet the most hideous alien lifeform of his entire career. He'd do anything to save his skin without rocking the boat - but mutiny? On the Bounty?

Customer Reviews:

One of the best Bill books out there.......2003-01-19

This is easily my favorite Bill book, and most of my friends put it high up on their list too. I think anyone would have a good time reading it.

What do people see in this book?.......2001-03-21

I'll be honest. I thought this book was crap. I bought it at a used book store because I thought it would be humorous and fun. It was humorous and fun, but Harrison's Stainless Steel Rat books were about ten times better while retaining the fun part. The characters were one-dimensional, the plot was merely an uninspiring parody of "Aliens," and the action was rather boring. It's a book for young people and readers who want a bit of mind candy.

Nothing quite like a Galactic hero.......1999-02-19

I must say that this being the first Bill bookI ever read, it was what got me hooked. A few things like the stone foot, and the elephant foot sprout weren't all that clear in the beginning because the stone foot's from the previous book, and then there's the two inch fangs and a black arm on the wrong side (but all that was explained in the first book which is another CLASSIC....well, except the foot thing) But after starting it I couldn't put it down. Harrison's unique and often farcical style is what makes this book a keeper. Many of the funniest things were small simple plays on words. Anyway, if you find yourself a copy of this book, GIVE IT TO ME! It's impossible to find, I got it from the library and it was gone the next time I looked for it, NEVER LET GO OF BILL BOOKS! EVER! I loaned volume 1 to my friend and I never got it back! >:- (

Bill is the best hero ever!.......1998-10-29

The book is a spoof on the alien movies, and is the best Bill the Galactic Hero book I have ever read. Harry Harrison does an excellent job in writing this funny yet suspensful book. A masterpiece of science fiction and comedy all rolled into one book. Don't start this book at night if you have to get up in the morning.

Bill The Greatest Galactic Hero Ever!.......1998-07-13

Bill the galactic hero is one of the geatest comedy action scifi characters of All time. His bizaare antics and his clumsyness are both so entertaining and suspenseful. I think bill should get his own movie soon.

The Planet of the Robot Slaves (Bill the Galactic Hero, Vol. 1)

Average customer rating:

Pretty Good Barthroom Humor
An enjoyable read with a message
Worst of the Worst
Would the orgy in the front quiet down?

The Planet of the Robot Slaves (Bill the Galactic Hero, Vol. 1)
Harry Harrison
Manufacturer: Avon Books (Mm)
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Science Fiction | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0380756617

Book Description

Bill would give his right arm to defend his Emperor against the alien Chingers - which is lucky seeing as he has two of them...

War demands sacrifices, and if you've lost one left arm, have an artificial foot and a set of nifty surgically-implanted tusks, it's a small price to pay for the privilege of being a hero. And Bill knows all about heroism - as part of a motley crew his new task is to track down the source of Chinger-controlled metal dragons that are making mincemeat out of humans...

Customer Reviews:

Pretty Good Barthroom Humor.......2004-03-16

Harry Harrison's Bill the Galactic Hero (BtGH) series is the sci-fi equivalent of Robert Aspirin's "Myth" fantasy books: pun-based humor is paramount and the more improbable the plotline the better.

This time around BtGH and company find themselves on the Planet of Usa after a nasty Chinger attack on their military base. Robotic lifeforms are the indigenous species on the planet, with two factions endlessly at war with each other. The Chingers have allied themselves with one of the factions (the one with the robot slaves), leaving the humans to ally themselves with the other. Residing on the planet are several humanoid groups, also endlessly at war with each other.

If you've picked up on the theme of endless war then this book might not be too subtle for you (if the theme escaped you, you might consider a position as a cadet with the Space Troopers). The machinations of war are severely criticized - and parodied - in the novel. In this respect the book is similar to Joseph Heller's Catch-22 (in much the same way that microwaveable pork rinds are akin to a Honeybaked ham), but because so little of the storyline can be taken seriously Harrison's commentary is easily dismissed if you happen to disagree with it.

The first BtGH book was divided into three major sections. Here the story takes place in half a dozen or so set pieces, each having very little to do with each other (beyond taking place on the Planet of the Robot Slaves). Some of them are funny (The Roman Legion vs. King Arthur), some of them are not (the PLDP).

Take away the comedy and there's not a lot to recommend this book. I happen to find character names like Cy BerPunk (computer technician) and Mel Praktis (doctor) mildly amusing - plus my father, brother and a nephew are each named Bill (only the nephew has true Galactic Hero potential), so it's fun to tweak them about their namesake. If these things don't hold true for you, you might want to consider reading a different book.

An enjoyable read with a message.......2003-11-30

Bill does not like danger, although he is supposed to really get a kick out of it, him being a Space Trooper and all. But no matter what he does -mainly trying to get danger as far as possible away from him or vice versa- heroism keeps following Bill without mercy. That is why he is still alive and kicking. That is, because of an earlier accident: kicking with his two right arms -there weren't any spare left ones- and his chicken leg -there weren't any human legs left. When his camp is attacked by gigantic metal dragons he volunteers not to be made member of the revenge mission, and that is exactly what his commander officer decides not to do...

Harry Harrison has a talent for the absurd. With seemingly no effort he paradises the whole science fiction genre and gets away with it. If you would want to compare him with to writers, you are bound to think of him as Terry Pratchett being genetically cloned in the neighborhood of Douglas Adams. Although Harrison never reaches the level of absurdness of Adams and is only a few times as funny as Pratchett, he still has created a quite enjoyable character in the hero of Bill. What makes this story special is its continuous anti-war message. Although most of the characters crave for some kind of unending battle, it is clear to the reader that the absurdness of the wars described in this book is certainly not far from what is happening in our world. It is certainly quite surprising and refreshing to see such theme appear in this kind of book.

Worst of the Worst.......2002-10-02

I read this book after reading most of the Stainless Steel Rat books--and finding them to be dwindling in creativity and vitality. Bill the Galactic Hero left me flabbergast--it is so bad. I imagined that this was a novel that Mr. Harrison had stuffed in his drawer, probably the first thing he tried to write when he was in Junior High School. Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad -- that's all I can say. I was trying to find my copy to see the marginal notes I had written, but I guess it was so bad I threw it away. That's how bad, bad, bad, bad it is.

Would the orgy in the front quiet down?.......1998-03-26

If you enjoy mindless sex and overindulgence in every aspect of life, this book is for you! It all starts out when the garbage tug Bill is on crashes onto an unknown planet called Usa (manufacturer of fine products the galaxy over). As the small little band of soldiers and drunkards are taken on a journey, things get a bit out of hand. If you don't mind the occasional typo and off-color humor, this book is great. I would give just about anything for this book. Verily, even my flabby buttocks!

Bill, the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Ten Thousand Bars (Bill, the Galactic Hero)

Average customer rating:

Not the best but good

Bill, the Galactic Hero: On the Planet of Ten Thousand Bars (Bill, the Galactic Hero)
Harry Harrison
Manufacturer: Avon Books (Mm)
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Science Fiction | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0380756668

Book Description

BARWORLD! For all the years that BILL had served in the Troopers, with all the hard beds, hard heads and no creds, any booze on offer was probably embalming fluid, or worse.

BARWORLD! An assignment there promised bubbly, brandy and beer galore - enough to give BILL's right arms (both of them) at last some idea of just what they were for.

But that was before Uncle Nancy's Cross-Dressing Emporium. And the Time/Space Resonation Nexus. And the Hippy from Hell.

They were enough to completely alter a person's perceptions of reality.

And, like, totally bum him out.

Customer Reviews:

Not the best but good.......2002-03-08

Just so people don't get confused, I thought it might be a good idea to mention here that this is exactly the same book as Bill the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Ten Thousand Bars, or if it isn't it's virtually the same. On the whole the book is good, although I must say it isn't as good as some of the others in the series. It has its amusing moments, but it is a bit on the bizarre side, no denying. If you enjoyed the previous outings of Bill then you ought to read this one for continuity sake if nothing else. I know this isn't a stellar review, but it's still a good book and worth the time it takes to read.

Bill, the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Bottled Brains

Average customer rating:

Pointless, But Maybe That's the Point
Read the first, Bill the Galactic Hero; skip this one
Good no-brainer
My Biography

Bill, the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Bottled Brains
Harry Harrison , and Robert Sheckley
Manufacturer: Avon Books (Mm)
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Science Fiction | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0380756625

Book Description

Bill should know that you never complain in the Troopers. But when his new foot looks like turning into something green, scaly and abundantly clawed, a visit to the medics would seem to be reasonable. But before he can say 'Quintiform computer error' he seems to have got himself volunteered again, this time for a suicide mission on Tsuris - the planet nobody ever comes back from.

A number, exactly a billion in fact, of Tsurisians have no body at all to speak of, and reside in bottles, which as Bill remarks, is an awful lot of bottles. And Bill is going to need all the bottle he possesses to get himself out of this one...

If you want to bravely probe where no one has ever probed before, then join Bill, Splock and Captain Dirk as once again our Galactic Hero investigates new depths in the realms of the science fiction cliche.

Customer Reviews:

Pointless, But Maybe That's the Point.......2004-05-04

This, the third installment of Bill the Galactic Hero, is by far the most pointless (or least pointed, depending on your point of view) yet. Among the disparate sci-fi references are Star Trek: TOS, Han Solo & Chewbacca, time travel, cyberpunk, and likely several others. Any one or two of these could be utilized in a first-rate parody - but that book would be a distant cousin several times removed from this book. What we have here, instead, is a hodge-podge of tangential references that momentarily amuse (if that) but come nowhere near providing a satisfying story. If you're a fan of the printed word you might like this book, because that's really all it amounts to: words printed on paper with the usual punctuation thrown in to form sentences. There's a vestigial plot, an intrusive narrative structure, faux profanity, alleged sex, and such low-grade humor that the puns in Book 2 seem like Mamet in retrospect - all of which I'm sure appeal to some audience out there, I just don't think I'm a part of it anymore.

Most of my frustration with the book is that plot points are raised, but never go anywhere. For instance, we are presented at one point with the Alterna-Crew of the USS Enterprise (cleverly renamed here the Gumption) from the "Mirror, Mirror" TV episode. We encounter them once, and they're referred to a couple more times, but nothing actually happens with them beyond getting Bill from plot point 1 to plot point 1.1 - and we really could have gone from point 0.9 to 1.2 and never noticed anything amiss. Likewise, we're told that the Alien Historian is trying to alter the past to create a future without war - and that he's succeeding; but we never encounter a single instance of an altered timeline as we travel from cover to cover. If these were isolated instances Harrison and Sheckley might be forgiven, but nothing of consequence ever takes place in the book and large sections could be removed without affecting the story on either side of it.

If you have a few hours to kill and are given the choice between reading this book or taking up self-dentistry, check to see if you'll get any anesthetic first. You won't want to read this book without it.

Read the first, Bill the Galactic Hero; skip this one.......2003-01-30

I read the first one about 6 months ago. A all-round good time, one mishap after another, the first book you wanted to see want would happen next, BUT this one! Jumps from one story line to another, with unbelievable plots, I know that it is Science Fiction but the authors could at lest try to make it believable. I felt it was three or even four books that were not related to each other, I would not recommend this one at all. I will try one more of the series, but if the next one is just as bad no more.

Good no-brainer.......2001-05-04

This is a good book for when you want to read something that has a plot and characters and all that literary stuff, but you don't want to have to actually think.

My Biography.......2000-06-13

If you haven't read this, but have read any of either author, then you haven't hallucinated anything yet.

It is a frivolous romp through a sad universe that seems populated with familiar faces by two of the great experts in the genre of humorous SF.

Read it or be forever the way you are. (Not that it will change anything permanent. Just a few yucks and a strange longing for a second right arm - even if the colours don't match.)

Filled with in-jokes that only a fan would get, it is a feast for the initiated.

Average customer rating:
Bill, the Galactic Hero on the Planet of Tasteless Pleasure
Harry and Bischoff, David Harrison
Manufacturer: Avon
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Science Fiction | Science Fiction & Fantasy | Subjects | Books | Adventure | Alternate History | Anthologies | General | Graphic Novels | High Tech | History & Criticism | Series | Short Stories | Space Opera
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Bill the Galactic Hero

ASIN: 0575052481

Book Description

BILL - the perfect Spaceship Trooper: big, brawny and brainwashed...

BILL - the perfect hero: ready to go anywhere, do anything to save his own neck, which is probably the only part of his body that is still his own...

BILL - back in the Army Hospital for yet another transplant and looking forward to a spot of R and R (which every Trooper translates as Rutting and Rotgut), and some respite from his troublesome adventures...

BILL doesn't have a hope. The nurses are steel robots, and he seems to have acquired a goat's foot - not for luck - at least, not the good kind. And the goat's foot seems to have acquired a goat-lady - the exceedingly demanding kind. She knows all about tasteless pleasure, and she aims to teach Bill everything he never wanted to know...

Average customer rating:
Bill the Galactic Hero
Harry Harrison
Manufacturer: Penguin
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
ASIN: B000M67190

Average customer rating:
Bill The Galactic Hero On The Planet Of Tasteless Pleasure
Harry Harrison
Manufacturer: Gollancz
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
ASIN: B000OIICO4

Average customer rating:
BILL THE GALACTIC HERO ON THE PLANET OF ZOMBIE VAMPIRES
H & Haldeman Harrison
Manufacturer: Gollancz
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
ASIN: B000K5RNZ0

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