Book Description
Pros, cons, and how-to's for an increasingly popular option.
Customer Reviews:
Wish I had read it sooner!.......2007-08-21
I read this book about a year after my daughter joined our family, at age four. It is the only book I have read like it. It takes you step-by-step through the process, from applying with an agency to the new child's adjustment - and the family's adjustment to their new arrival.
I wish I had read it before we started, although I read many other good books. I like that Adopting the Older Child addresses some of the feelings people don't like to talk about...like the adoptive parents doubting whether they made the right decision. I also like that it explores older child adoption among different types of families (those with bio kids, those without, etc.).
My only 'complaint' is that it does kind of wrap up the case studies a bit too neatly at the end...as if the issues are all gone after a few years. Most who have adopted older children will agree that some of the emotional issues will be life-long issues, to an extent. Other than that, I thought it was great! Highly recommended!
Christine Mitchell
Author and Illustrator of Welcome Home, Forever Child Welcome Home, Forever Child: A Celebration of Children Adopted as Toddlers, Preschoolers, and Beyond
Must Have book on Adoption.......2006-07-18
My husband and I are in the process of adopting an older child from the ages of 3-8. We went through our adoption classes and received alot of great information we will need but I was also reading this book at the same time. I was able to ask questions to our instructor that I would never have thought of without the book. I loved the way the author put in characters of the adoptive child awaiting adoption, Parents waiting to adopt, The case workers point of view, and all the emotions they were going through. I told our instructor about this book and she said she would let other adoptive parents know about it. This book was so informative and fun to read that I found myself not wanting to put it down.
This book is a must have for anyone thinking of adoption. It may have been written 20 years ago but you couldn't tell since the information is mostly about emotions and how to work together with the child but also with your case workers. I was already excited about adopting an older child but this book helped me to prepare for the best and worse of situations that may occur adopting an older child. If you buy this book you won't regret it!
Surprisingly Current Almost 30 Years Later.......2006-02-18
As we move forward in the adoption process of a 17 yr. old, I am thrilled to have just read this book. It was an easy read, full of insight, with just the right balance of warmth and challenge. Best of all, as both a professional counselor and adoptive mother (seven times over!) the author is truly credible, including a nice mix of research and personal experience. I give this book my highest recommendation.
Excellent and Informative........2003-12-23
This book dicusses the adoption of older children. Through a series of stories told in the viewpoint of the adoptive parents, adoptive children, and their social worker, readers gain insight into what they can expect during the process. This book put to ease some of my fars about adopting an older child, and makes me feel more equipped to handle situations when our time to adopt comes.
THE BEST BOOK ON ADOPTION!!.......2003-10-29
If you are considering adoption, especially of an older child, THIS IS A MUST HAVE BOOK!! I adopted an 8 year old special needs boy in 1992, and this book was my bible. It was like a road map of what to expect. Nothing my son did ever caught me by surprise. So instead of worrying what I was doing wrong, I was able to focus on his needs. This book gave me the foundation on which to stand. Today, my son is a healthy, well-respected young man; I thank Ms. Jewett for her excellent book. She helped make it happen.
Book Description
Finally..a book that genuinely celebrates a young child joining their forever family past infancy. With its touching message of love and reassurance, and whimsical illustrations, Welcome Home, Forever Child is sure to be cherished by children and parents alike. While best suited to children ages two to eight, this gem will undoubtedly be enjoyed by older children as well. Most children's adoption books reflect infant adoptions, and may not be appropriate for the older child who spent their early years in foster care or an orphanage. Welcome Home, Forever Child is a much needed book that social workers and therapists will want to recommend to families who adopted their child past the age of two. The book helps parents reassure children of their permanent place in the new family, and of how much they are wanted and loved. It will also make a very special and meaningful keepsake gift for a child upon joining his or her new family, upon finalizing the adoption, or upon the anniversary of either event. READ WHAT TOP ADOPTION AND PARENTING EXPERTS ARE SAYING ABOUT WELCOME HOME, FOREVER CHILD: "I truly enjoyed reading this book. Children will love the pictures and delightful rhymes. This book helps adopted kids to celebrate life and activities in their adoptive home while providing a framework to understand their infancy in another place. This book will be useful in helping children bond to adoptive parents." - Foster Cline, M.D., co-author with Jim Fay - Parenting with Love and Logic and Parenting Teens with Love and Logic "A great way to help young children to understand what adoption and forever means in their lives. Parents and children will love to see the many firsts they will share while grieving the ones they missed. Fun illustrations and the rhyming cadence are sure to delight the preschool set." - Regina M. Kupecky, LSW - co-author with Gregory Keck - Adopting the Hurt Child and Parenting the Hurt Child "This book provides reassurance to child
Customer Reviews:
Perfect for any older-child adoption.......2007-08-29
The book Welcome Home, Forever Child is a wonderful children's book! This one is different from the children's books I've reviewed in the past, as this one is written particularly for children who are NOT adopted as infants. There is a whole different set of issues and questions that go along with a child who is adopted at an older age. They may remember experiences shared with birth and/or foster families, and have questions about how long they will be with their "new" family.
If you've adopted a toddler, preschooler, or older child, then this book is a MUST for your family! Author Christine Mitchell shares a story of love and the meaning of adoption in rhyming words that children will love to hear and easily understand. It will help create a bond with adoptive parents, and explain to the child what "forever" means.
The illustrations are so sweet. The author has used cats as the characters in the story. I love this because it makes the book appropriate for any type of adoptive situation- transracial, etc. The book starts out by talking about all the important milestones that may have been missed by the adoptive parents, but goes on to primarily focus on all the "firsts" that are to come, with a promise of being there to share in them. I am sure this book will be one that you will read over and over again with your child(ren).
Well Done! .......2007-08-21
Christine Mitchell successfully communicates a much needed message, on a child's level, that both the adopted toddler and the parent need reinforced...the many firsts that they will share. Great job!
Chuck Giacinto - Producer of the Adoptive Music CD releasesThe Spirit of Adoption & Lullabies - For China's Daughters & Their Adoptive Families
Heartwarming and Endearing.......2007-04-05
I am a kindergarten teacher and loved this book from the first moment I read it! I was so touched by the message of love, hope, permanence and a lifetime of memories that an adopted child would finally find with his/her new adoptive family. I bought this book for a friend who is in the process of adopting two older children.
C.Botello, Adoptive Support Services, Family Stress Center.......2007-03-06
Review sent in :Christine's book has captured into words and pictures the often hard to mention past of an older adopted child in a very warm and accepting manner. Acknowledging an adoptive child's beginnings is very important for the basis of self-esteem in the present and basic trust in the future. I love the simple yet straight forward manner Christine handles the loss of not being in their child's life from the beginning. As a professional in adoption support groups, I highly recommend this book. It will inspire both child and parent to work towards a healthy, honest and loving relationship. Cathy Botello, Adoptive Family Support Services, FSC
For Adoptive Families of All Colors.......2007-02-24
I love that this much-needed book works equally well for transracial families because each member of the cat family depicted is a different color and pattern. My daughter (adopted as a baby) was very moved by it and requested that I read it again and again. I give it a standing ovation!
Book Description
Based on the author's experiences as an adoptive mother and foster parent, as well as interviews with numerous adoptive families, adoption professionals and adults who were adopted, Our Own thoroughly explores both the joys and the challenges of older child adoption. Suitable for families adopting domestically or internationally, it covers such topics as:
Evaluating whether you have what it takes to adopt a child who's no longer a baby.
Choosing an agency and finding a child to adopt.
Dealing with school officials, language difficulties, and grade placement.
Recognizing how grief affects childrens behavior.
Deciding how much birthfamily contact is appropriate.
Teaching your child to deal with racism.
Handling difficult behavior such as tantrums and lying.
Testing for and treating attachment disorder, ADHD, posttraumatic stress disorder, hepatitis, parasites, and other mental health and medical issues.
Customer Reviews:
Balanced between reality and optimism.......2003-01-31
Reading this book affirmed for me that we were doing the right thing by not adopting an infant. This book is chocked full of in-your-face warnings, but also celebrates your choice to adopt. Very informative. Easy to read writing voice. Great buy! :) I would also reccomend Waiting for You: An Heirloom Adoption Journal for My Future Child. It is an expectancy journal that works well with older children. If you're adopting, God Bless your adoption journey!
Maskew gives good suggestions and explanations.......2001-08-06
I have adopted an African seven year old and I found Trish Maskew's book very very helpful, together with Adopting the Hurt Child you can be prepared for anything.
What her book had which I haven't seen in ANY OTHER adoption book is a CLEAR explanation of the different types of hepatitis B and other illness/test results (there are different positives which mean different things). None of my adoption counselors understood this and I gave them my copy of the book when I was through with it. I was worried about positives but realized there is a big difference between "exposure" and actually having the disease.
For that reason, I'd recommend her book to anyone adopting kids with health problems. Trish is also online on an older-child mailing list and she frequently answers questions there. A very wise, practical, clear-writing woman!
Excellent resource.......2000-09-06
I read this as we were matched with a sibling pair - 10 and 12 yr olds and it was a godsend! We're 3 months into the adoption, this book was on the mark so many, many times! It is excellent and I've been reading many books on adoption - this one addressed what we needed - older children - not infants, not international. I highly recommend it to anyone involved. Some of the info may scare you, but it's worth knowing!
Informative and Honest.......2000-07-24
This book was purchased along with Adopting The Hurt Child byKeck. My husband and I are planning on adopting older siblings, andwe were looking for resources to prepare us as much as possible. Unlike Keck trying to make a statement about the system our children find themselves mixed up in, Trish Maskew provides a realistic approach to the actual adoption and parenting of older children. She gave us a realistic perspective on the children in a positive way. She informs you of many possibilities in a way which does not scare you into changing your mind. Surprisingly, after having read her book, we are more determined that this is what we want to do. We also feel confident that we are fundamentally educated and prepared. She provides many up-to-date resources in Appendix form, and also gives real-life examples of how to make a not-so good situation better. She provides numerous examples of problem solving ideas, along with very informative reference information about many of the problems Our children face. Many of her comments about sensitive comments people can make hit home with me, and I appreciated her down-to-earth language. I found this book a very easy read, and finished it in a couple of hours. I highlighted numerous points throughout her book to share with my husband. I also noted numerous suggestions she makes for us during the journey to adoption. I would ABSOLUTELY recommend this book to anybody considering adopting older children. I am extremely glad that I found her book amist the scarce up-to-date resources.
A must read - realistic but positive.......2000-03-15
I love this book. I have 6 kids, 2 born to me and 4 older child adoptions. One set of sibs came home three years ago, the other last August. This books makes me laugh and cry at the same time. I read so many stories that were just like mine - and I've never found this anywhere else. The book is well organized and covers at least briefly almost any topic that could come up during an older child adoption. The balance betweeen domestic and international experiences is also helpful, as info on international older child adoptions is really scarce. The author also does an excellent job describing and putting into realistic perspective the emotional issues these kids come with - although I think a lot of the material is probably most relevant to school aged children as opposed to toddlers and preschoolers. In my opinion, throughout her book she remains positive and encouraging. I don't understand the previous reviewer's comment that this book is depressing - far from it to me. It was inspiring and realistic, but also reinforced the truth that the joys of parenting older adopted children are beyond measure. Seeing a hurt child heal and truely smile with joy from the bottom of her soul, perhaps for the first time in years, is an experience that makes all others pale. Having this book available is like having a personal coach at your side. Thank you Trish Maskew!
Book Description
Discover the grim truths and real hope that hurting children can be healed through adoptive and foster parents, social workers, and others who care. Includes information on foreign adoptions.
Customer Reviews:
I really like this book!.......2006-12-21
This book was very helpful. It helped me even though I haven't ever adopted. It helped me understand hurting kids more. I will buy this book! I would like to adopt older kids when I'm married. Besides I have known several foster/adopted kids. It helped me understand them.
finally.......2006-06-08
I read this book twice I liked it so much. I found many books minimized the struggle of raising adopted children and focussed too much on only the positive. Although I have not raised any adopted children myself I do plan on it after I finish university. After reading many books I knew it couldn't be as flowery as they put it. Although I am sure no book could truly prepare anyone for the realities of raising childeren it can help you understand where things are comming from. If nothing else I have a greater respect for the adoptive family because of this book!!!
Dead-on.......2005-03-03
My wife and I adopted a 5 and 7 yr old from Russia in Sept 2004. They have been diagnosed as mildly RAD, but RAD nonetheless. RAD is Reactive Attachment Disorder for those of you just beginning a path to adoption of older children. I can say from first-hand experience of the past six months that what Keck has written is true, verified and helpful in many ways. I would highly recommend this as a read while you are CONSIDERING adopting older children, domestic or otherwise. It is best to be prepared and accepting of the conditions that you will likely face before you suddenly realize what's going on with your child(ren). Between Keck and Nancy Thomas (When Love is Not Enough), your preparation for dealing with the behaviors that will sooner or later emerge will be rewarded in your ability to maintain some sanity in your home. You are also welcome to view our online story at http://www.hakpenguin.com/adoption_news.cfm
A Landmark Book on Attachment & Adoption.......2002-11-27
Two years ago, we assumed guardianship of my husband's troubled 12-year old niece. She was my husband's sister's child and came from a "House of Horrors." Every conceivable problem existed. Drug abuse, domestic violence, sick pornography, sibling incest, severe parental neglect, sarcasm, ridicule, brutality and denial. She came from the inner city, to our sheltered, happy home in the suburbs. It was akin to someone moving to a foreign country. Fortunately, I read "Adopting the Hurt Child." The book was a lifesaver. I do not exaggerate. Social workers and incompetent therapists seemed to blame us for her problems, (and we hadn't had her for even a year). The authors said this is common. Adoptive parents take the heat for the original family's neglect. The authors nailed every single issue, or problem, with razor sharp accuracy. Our niece is an actress with attachment issues. She wears masks. She plots, she cannot "be." She was never taught real love or how to be with people. Her presence in our household really shook us to the core. She acted coquettish and manipulative with my husband; snide to me (the mom). I do not see the book as negative, but as candid. Love isn't always enough. Movies may have happy endings, but real life is altogether different. Sometimes, these children do not get better. At least, empowered with the advice of this book, you can seek better therapy treatments, know what kind of therapist to hire, and sniff out the bad ones immediately. Now, two years later, we found an attachment therapist. This terrific therapist cannot be manipulated. She is both tough and compassionate. We made more progress with her -- in three sessions, than our niece did with a sex abuse counselor in a year. Our niece still has many problems, and time will tell. We are hanging in there. And I still reference this book. It's just superb. God bless both the authors.
It tells it the way it is!.......2002-10-28
This is an excellent book and a must for anyone considering fostering or adopting a child older than the age of one. Before getting our first set of foster children (sibling group of 4) I could not make it half way through the book, because it upset me so much. I just could not believe that it was really like they said it was. IT IS EXACTLY LIKE THEY SAID IT WAS! After having the chilren a couple of months I read the book through being able to relate to everything they said. It is all extremely sad, but true. And if anyone wants to help these children , they must be aware of their needs so they can meet them. Love is just not enough. I had a friend, who has adopted 8 children, tell me that before our endeavor, and I did not believe her. Now I know she is right and now I listen to every word of advice she can give me. This book will open your eyes to the sad, hard truth. Read it and weep, but it WILL prepare you to understand and help these children. I wish everyone the very best and when you get discouraged, ask yourself if that child would have been better off if they had never come into your home. I am sure your answer will be "NO." And when you are done with the book, give it to your social worker to read. Of course they could never completely understand until they have fostered or adopted themselves, but it is a start.
Book Description
Tens of thousands of children in the United States alone are waiting in foster care for parents, and many Americans, single and married, want to open their hearts and homes to these children who wait. A landmark 1980 federal law made adopting and raising special needs children affordable even for people of limited means. What could be easier than matching these kids to these families? The reality is that many prospective adopters never complete the adoption process because of red tape, regulations, and institutional lethargy. Among the adults who complete a homestudy or placement, lack of support services and advocacy training sometimes leads to heartbreak and adoption failure--not a happy ending. Adopting and Advocating for the Special Needs Child bridges the gap between the desire to help a waiting child and the reality of America's special needs adoption system. It is designed to be used by adoption professionals and adoptive parents, to help them get started, keep going, and locate whatever additional information and support they need. The authors are adoption professionals, long-time support volunteers, child advocates, and mothers of a total of 23 children, 14 of them adopted children with special needs.
Customer Reviews:
Written by authors who love children.......2003-09-06
Love is not all a child needs to make an adoption work, and the authors show us this truth in their vast personal and professional experience in adopting special needs children. Prospective adoptive parents of special needs children, both domestic and international, will greatly benefit from the important information and insights into critical emotional, educational and criminal issues dealt with in this wonderful book. I heartily recommend it to everyone.
Gisela Gasper Fitzgerald, author of ADOPTION: An Open, Semi-Open or Closed Practice?
A must read for all fost/adopt parents!.......2001-06-21
Adopting and Advocating for the Special Needs Child is well written, interesting and knows its audience (written in layman's terms). This book should be given to all parents of foster children who are considering adoption.
An excellent guide through the process of adoption........2000-10-10
If you are going to read only one book on adopting children with special needs let this be the one. With their vast personal and professional experience in adopting special needs children, Babb and Law clearly explain the most important information and most critical emotional issues which pre-adoptive parents need to consider. My husband and I have adopted three special needs children. This book helped us understand how to advocate for ourselves as we moved through the process of adoption, how to advocate for the children both before and after the adoption and how to address some of the many complex emotional issues faced by a family which chooses to care for and love special needs children. My hearfelt thanks go out to Rita Law and Anne Babb for this wonderful gift of book.
A wealth of much needed information!!!.......1999-09-08
For parents interested in or beginning the adoption process, this book answers questions you would never have known to ask while clarifying the mysteries of the adoption system. For parents like me who have finalized two adoptions, it informs me of a wealth of options that are (or should be) available to help me and my children and gives me the strength and courage to seek those options. Thank-you to Babb and Laws for providing what I believe will be used as a workbook of knowledge in implementing services for children. I sincerely hope every family and professional that works with "special needs" children will take the time to read this wonderful, informative book. These children are our future...and Babb & Laws give us the much needed information to help them on their journey! Again, many thanks and blessings to the authors, Eileen W.!!!
Essential Tool for Special Needs Adoption.......1998-02-25
This book should be required reading for everyone considering "Special Needs" adoption. I recommend the book be read before you start the process. It's a wealth of current information. This book is written so well that you will enjoy reading it.
Average customer rating:
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Adopting Older Children
Alfred Kadushin
Manufacturer: Columbia University Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
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Health o Meter HDC100-01 "Grow with Me" Teddy Bear Scale for Babies and Toddlers
ASIN: 0231033222 |
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Forever Family; Our Adventures in Adopting Older Children
Ruth Piepenbrink
Manufacturer: OUR SUNDAY VISITOR
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
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ASIN: 0879738073 |
Average customer rating:
- Important and Interesting Info for all those involved
- Good news and bad news about adoption
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Forever Parents: Adopting Older Children
James E. Kloeppel
Manufacturer: Adele Enterprises
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
Sociology
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Accessories:
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philosophy hope in a jar daily moisturizer
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Braun IRT 4020 ThermoScan Ear Thermometer
ASIN: 0964037416 |
Customer Reviews:
Important and Interesting Info for all those involved.......2003-12-10
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and wanted to buy a copy to find it's no longer published and a premium price would need to be paid to get a copy.
My husband and I are in the process of adopting a sibling group of 2. This is by far the best and closest to home book I've read yet. I enjoyed reading the trials and tribulations of the Kloeppel's and most importantly the wonderful outlook and positive changes that take place.
In our process, we realized how every person you tell takes the news differently - some very enthused, some skeptically. I would highly recommend this reading to grand-parents and friends and/or other relatives interested, we need support just like any new mom or dad - although this is a little different, it really isn't. I could even see an older adopted child in Junior High enjoying reading this one.
Life is not simple, but it's rewarding with a lot of hard work ...... should adoption be any different.
Good news and bad news about adoption.......1998-02-25
"Personal" stories about adoption are hard to sell to publishers, since they have a limited market. All's the pity, because they can be invaluable to those of us struggling, or about to struggle, with similar issues.
When they discovered James' infertility, the Kloeppels chose adoption, first of one sibling group of two, and later another. This book is an honest, and sometimes painful, account of both the challenges and the rewards the Kloeppels encountered.
The Kloeppel felt that they were reasonably well-prepared for the first adoption and very well-prepared for the second; yet, both times, they were taken by surprise and found themselves struggling with the children's serious behavior problems. Their salvation, in many ways, was an adoptive parents' support group. Too bad they were never helped through their agency, via some kind of adoption preservation service, or guided by a knowledgeable family therapist.
The good news in this book is that older children can be "successfully" adopted, growing and healing and becoming a source of joy and pride to their adoptive parents. The bad news is that adoptive parents are frequently left to fend for themselves rather than being connected, from day one, with supports and resources to facilitate a successful placement by helping adoptive parents help their troubled kids.
By the end of the book, the four Kloeepel children are apparently well-functioning and well-adjusted, and it seems as though their pasts and their adoption are no longer issues. I'm curious about what the Kloeppels would say by way of a sequel, for I cannot imagine that the road ahead will be entirely smooth. At the same time, I am grateful to this couple for sharing their story with me, as I plan for my own adoption of older children.
Average customer rating:
- Outdated, still helpful in some ways
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No More Here and There: Adopting the Older Child
Ann Carney
Manufacturer: Univ of North Carolina Pr
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback
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Accessories:
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Health o Meter HDC100-01 "Grow with Me" Teddy Bear Scale for Babies and Toddlers
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Braun IRT 4020 ThermoScan Ear Thermometer
ASIN: 0807812781 |
Customer Reviews:
Outdated, still helpful in some ways.......1999-05-20
This is an outdated book detailing an older child domestic adoption. Written in the 70s, I was disappointed to find that nothing was mentioned of single parent adoptions (unheard of at the time), transracial, or international adoptions. For me (single) much of this book seemed condescending. Once I got beyond this, I found that I could still utilize some of the information (feelings of the child, adopting sibling groups, etc). Read it with the knowledge that much has changed (thankfully) since it was written.
Books:
- Ageless Body, Timeless Mind: The Quantum Alternative to Growing Old
- Applied Kinesiology: A Training Manual and Reference Book of Basic Principles and Practices
- Basic Arrhythmias (6th Edition)
- Bill Walsh: Finding the Winning Edge
- C.A.R.E. Packages for the Workplace: Dozens of Little Things You Can Do To Regenerate Spirit At Work
- Chakras For Beginners: Honor Your Energy (For Beginners)
- Chicken Soup for the Couple's Soul
- Chicken Soup for the Mother & Daughter Soul: Stories to Warm the Heart and Honor the Relationship
- Chicken Soup for the Volunteer's Soul: Stories to Celebrate the Spirit of Courage, Caring and Community
- Cunningham's Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs (Llewellyn's Sourcebook Series)
Books Index
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Our Own: Adopting and Parenting the Older Child
Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today's Parents
Adopting the Hurt Child: Hope for Families With Special-Needs Kids : A Guide for Parents and Professionals
Parenting the Hurt Child : Helping Adoptive Families Heal and Grow
Parenting Your Adopted Older Child: How to Overcome the Unique Challenges and Raise a Happy and Healthy Child
