Connecting with God's Family

Book Description

With six sessions in each volume, The Doing Life Together series provides small group member with basic training on how to live healthy and balanced lives.

Beyond the First Visit: The Complete Guide to Connecting Guests to Your Church

Average customer rating:

Helpful but unremarkable...
Beyond Helpful
Guesterize Your Church!
A Book the Motivates
Worth the read

Beyond the First Visit: The Complete Guide to Connecting Guests to Your Church
Gary L. McIntosh
Manufacturer: Baker Books
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
Similar Items:

First Impressions: Creating Wow Experiences In Your Church
Simple Church: Returning to God's Process for Making Disciples
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Finding Them, Keeping Them: Effective Strategies for Evangelism and Assimilation in the Local Church

ASIN: 0801091845
Release Date: 2006-09-01

Book Description

All churches like to think that theirs is the friendliest in town. But do visitors see it that way? Church consultant Gary McIntosh invites readers to take a look at their church through the eyes of visitors and potential visitors. His starting point, grounded in an understanding of God as a ''welcomer,'' is that churches should see those who enter their doors as not merely visitors, but as guests, and themselves as gracious hosts. This practical book offers sound advice on assessing and improving the ways in which churches attract people, welcome them, do follow-up, and bring them into the church family. It also offers suggestions for making a welcoming attitude part of the very fabric of the local church.

Customer Reviews:

Helpful but unremarkable..........2007-09-19

I'm on staff at our church in the area of First Impressions, and the subtitle of this book ("Connecting Guests to Your Church") is a major part of what I do. When I first saw this book, I knew that I needed to read it.

Quite frankly, I was disappointed on several fronts. First and foremost, this book felt like it was written for the church of the 1980s. I was taken aback by the almost complete failure to mention internet strategies. When it was discussed at the end of Chapter 5, it was almost as if the reader was supposed to be only vaguely aware that the "World Wide Web" even exists.

I was also frustrated by the rather hokey feel of many of McIntosh's suggestions. The DWYPYWD principle (Do what you promised you would do)? Come on, that's a ridiculous and utterly useless acronym. The rule of three-thirty-three? The MOT (Moment of Truth)? I just think that this stuff is silly.

I was disappointed by one underlying message throughout the book, that the purpose of making good connections with guests is to convince them to attend your church rather than another church. But this totally misses the point of caring about guests. We don't need to be very concerned about the folks who are going to end up at a church somewhere. Our energies should be directed to the folks who are going to choose between attending our church and never attending church again. Those are the folks for whom first impressions and guesterizing strategies should be focused.

Finally, I could not see how Chapter 13 fit into this book. In the midst of all of his connection strategies, McIntosh spends this chapter providing a brief summary of the emergent church movement. Maybe this primer would be helpful for older pastors who have missed the entire emergent thing (and have only recently discovered the World Wide Web and really enjoy acronyms like DWYPYWD), but it seemed completely out of place in this book.

Having been rather critical and even somewhat sarcastic so far in my review, "Beyond the First Visit" was not a complete loss. The strength of this book is that it is relatively comprehensive. McIntosh speaks into a host of topics and goes to great lengths to explain why each of these seemingly insignificant details is actually quite important. His attention to the little things is commendable and should help the reader be aware of the myriad of things that churches need to consider as folks outside the church investigate what we do every week when we come together for corporate worship.

Ultimately, I'm glad that I read this book. There is much good content that can help church leaders to think through the impression that they leave with guests. However, it was far from what it could have been. If you're looking to think about these things in a totally new and refreshing way, I'd recommend Mark Waltz's "First Impressions" instead.

Beyond Helpful.......2007-06-27

Great - practical book. Helps you see your church from a "guest's" (not visitor) point of view. Practical questions to ask for all teams within the church from worship to nursery to building and grounds. Easy to implement in your own setting, not a cookie cutter approach to church. Very helpful

Guesterize Your Church!.......2007-06-19

Inviting guests to your church is easy. Getting them to stay is not. Gary McIntosh's new book offers concrete suggestions for getting guests to stay "beyond the first visit."

I began reading Beyond the First Visit in January 2007 when my wife and I moved to California's central coast to pastor a church. We didn't know anyone in the area or the church, so for a while we felt like guests in our own congregation. I grew up in a pastor's home and was associate pastor to a long-time friend, so this was a new feeling for me. But it was a very valuable feeling, for it gave me an important insight into how guests at our church feel all the time. (And I have a very friendly church!)

According to McIntosh, we need to "guesterize" our churches. That is, we need "to make a church more responsive to its guests and better able to attract new ones." From the moment guests step foot on our campuses, they need to feel a welcome invitation to be there as well as opportunities to connect with others and get involved in the life of the church.

Each chapter of Beyond the First Visit includes numerous suggestions for making your church guest-friendly, real-life examples of what works and what doesn't, and discussion questions that can be used individually or among leadership groups.

If your church has many guests, but few who stay, read Beyond the First Visit. It will open your eyes to your guests' point of view.

A Book the Motivates.......2007-04-02

This is an excellent, practical, and insightful book on how growing a church to the next level can be done. The author has writen it from the biblical, psychological and sociological perspectives which therefore makes it a wholistic and comprehensive treatise on how to boost the attendance of a declined or declining church. Read it and put it into a action. The growth of your church will surprise you.

Worth the read.......2006-11-10

He has several, practical steps for making your church more hospitable. From the 10 foot rule, to the 5 minute rule, to such advice as "Recruit for attitude, Train for people for skills," it was worth the purchase.

The Complete Guide to Marriage Mentoring: Connecting Couples to Build Better Marriages

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The Complete Guide to Marriage Mentoring: Connecting Couples to Build Better Marriages
Dr. Les Parrott III , and Dr. Leslie Parrott
Manufacturer: Zondervan
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover

General | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
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Marriage Mentor Manual, The
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The Complete Resource Kit for Marriage Mentoring: Everything You Need to Launch a Marriage Mentoring Program

ASIN: 0310270464

Book Description

Here Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott provide the complete guide to becoming a marriage mentor. They instruct the individuals who guide couples in many different stages of married life through emphasizing working as a team, building rapport, walking in another couple’s shoes, and praying together. The book includes three major sections: The Big Picture on Marriage Mentoring, The Marriage Mentoring Triad, and The Essential Skills for Marriage Mentoring, to help churches of any size provide a healthy marriage mentoring program.

Average customer rating:

Challenging but profound...
Diagnosing the Ills and Prescribing a (Structural) Cure to Weak Community
I suppose a grade of 'E' might assume that there was Effort.
NT Church for the 21st Century?
Essential Reading for All

Connecting Church, The
Randy Frazee
Manufacturer: Zondervan
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover

General | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
Similar Items:

Making Room for Life: Trading Chaotic Lifestyles for Connected Relationships
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Making Small Groups Work

ASIN: 0310233089

Book Description

This book explores the three essential elements of real community and helps readers put into practice the fifteen principles that undergird those essentials.

Customer Reviews:

Challenging but profound..........2006-12-01

This is the second time that I've read Randy Frazee's "The Connecting Church," and it has become a favorite of mine. I've read it both times with other people, and in both cases, there were folks who struggled with his concepts. His basic premise is that the American lifestyle, even (and maybe especially) in the church, is dominated by the triplet evils of individualism, isolation, and consumerism. These principles are ultimately antithetical to the gospel, yet they dominate the lives of most American Christians. So, he suggests the reestablishment of common purpose, common place, and common possessions as the solutions to these crises. And his explanation of those solutions is radical, to say the least.

One of the strengths of Frazee's book is his ability to describe the problem. And I have never heard anyone who was able to refute his assessment of American (suburban) life. Most Christians experience aggravating levels of isolation and overcommitment and stress and hecticness, but they feel hopeless to change it. Where most people buck against Frazee is his proposed solutions to the problems.

Frazee suggests that if we want to fix the woes in our lives, we need to make seismic shifts to how we do things. And that means that small groups, the common antidote for isolation within the church, may not be getting the job done. He suggests that most small groups are actually just another layer of complexity, another thing to do, and further aggravate our isolation, rather than providing a place for authentic community and relationships as God intended for us. And my own experience, personally and as I work on our church staff to help oversee our small group ministry, certainly confirms a significant grain of truth to that assessment.

So, Frazee has the guts to suggest that we ought to make some or all of the following changes. We need to stop spending so much time commuting, either changing to a less lucrative job or moving closer to work. We need to move away from the assumption that two incomes are prerequisites for happy living. We need to stop spending so much time ferrying children around to various activities, limiting their involvement in extracurriculars. We need to draw back from being on a dozen different teams and committees at church and spend more time at home. We need to become less independent and allow our neighbors to regularly get into our lives. We need to intentionally connect with our neighbors, spending time in the front yard and on the front porch. This neighborhood focus should be where we invest our relational energy, thereby providing the context for the following tenets of healthy Christian relationships: spontaneity, availability, frequency, common meals, and geography.

At the end of the day, Frazee proposes big changes. And many people are unwilling to give up some idols in which they have placed their trust, like high-paying jobs and multiple-income households and lots of unnecessary purchases and complete autonomy from other people. But it is our commitment to these things that keeps us from experiencing the abundant life that Jesus promised us.

I am a long way from implementing everything in this book. I haven't even figured out exactly which parts I need to implement. And I'm further still from deciding what I think I should pursue as areas of growth for our church. But I know that Frazee has provided us with many nuggets of hard truth that we need to hear and ponder. And I know that the picture that he presents of what authentic community could look like is extremely appealing to everyone who reads it. And I know that it's not purely idealistic because there are people who are actually doing it.

So, the challenge is to not sit in complacence or laziness and actually do something to make a change because I know that God has called me and our church to something more than what we have right now. And I thank Frazee for having the courage to lay it on the line and share his learning with us. I think that every American Christian ought to read this book and at least give some time and effort to consider how God might want us to respond.

Diagnosing the Ills and Prescribing a (Structural) Cure to Weak Community.......2006-07-26

If you're like me (or the fictional Bob and Karen Johnson in this book), genuine community is hard to come by, even in small groups. Ever find yourself frustrated by the low-level of relational connections at church? Have small groups, no matter how small, ever failed to meet your expectations, your need, of community? Have you ever deliberately avoided talking to a neighbor because you felt like you didn't have time to talk? If so, I encourage you to read two books--Kindgom of Couches (which i posted on earlier) and The Connecting Church: Beyond Small Groups to Authentic Community. If Walker's book focuses more on the inner workings of community, Frazee focuses on the outer obstacles and structural solutions to a culture rife with individualism.

Former pastor of Pantego Bible in Arlington, Texas, Randy Frazee lays out a simple, straightforward critique and cure to the ills of the Evangelical church's lack of significant, authentic community. Small groups won't cut it. Something greater, more systemic is at odds with our need for community. Frazee writes: "The church of the twenty-first century must do more than add worlds [i.e. personal world, parent world, etc.] to an already overbooked society; it must design new structures that help people simplify their lives and deveop more meaning, depth, purpose and community." (37) Frazee delivers. He gives us vision and structure for more satisfying community.

The obstacles of individualism, isolationism, and consmerism are critiqued by Frazee through his pastoral experience and sociological analysis (Locke, Meeks, etc). These ills are offered a cure through three main venues: Common Purpose, Common Place, and Common Possessions. The book is full of pastoral insights, some of which can be found on (49, 67, 82-3, 92). I'll just give some broadstrokes here.

Common Purpose - Too many churches don't really share common beliefs. Sure, the church has a statement of faith, and members sign off on it, but most churches fail to shepherd thier flock into a common creed. This raises Frazee's more questionable solution, identifying 52 values (community), beliefs (Trinity), and practices (social justice) that constitute his preaching calendar. It seems to me that the biblical interpretation will inevitably be forced to fit the mold of his Spiritual Formation Calendar. Nevertheless, the critique rings true and the solution is to more faithfully catechize, not just doctrinally, but also practically.

Common Place - Frazee essentially argues for a return to the neighborhood concept, where your neighbors really are people you hang out with. He recommends several Christians moving into a neighborhood to deliberately pursue community and outreach, making small groups geographic-specific and involvement intensive. Alongside these small, neighborhood groups, he recommends larger, mid-size groups, composed of regional small groups for the purpose of corporate teaching instructionand fellowship. The large worship service is reserved for inspiration and preaching.

Common Possessions - It's not what you think. Frazee doesn't recommend forming a commune and sharing everything you own- one T.V. per 10 families- no. Instead, he recognizes in Acts a willingness to and practice of sharing one's possessions. He suggests several key characteristics: interdependence (consider how you can share your resources, not just add to them), intergenerational life (seek the wisdom possessed by others), sacrifice (giving to others, even when it hurts), responsibility (recognize the biblical imperative to care for others), and children (include them, no matter how difficult, in small groups).

More could be said. I'll leave you to read it. Suffice it to say, this book will significantly shape the structure of my approach to community. One thing the book lacks is a biblical motivation for community (the gospel- forgiveness for failure and strength for victory). It is, at times, hyper-optomistic, but it does cast a vision.

I suppose a grade of 'E' might assume that there was Effort........2004-12-10

I am a strong advocate of churches taking hold of the principles of community that appear to be evident in the book of Acts. I can also see why some might read this book and give it 5 stars for proposing any old solution to what is a rather profound problem in the church today, and perhaps (as I think most would concede) for its interesting account in the 2nd half of the book regarding the author's experience with small groups in his church in Texas. The first half of the book, however, starts with such extreme and completely UNFOUNDED conclusions about American society and churches that many readers may not bother to read the rest of the book. Reading this book produced a few brief moments of excitement over sharing the author's view of the "lack of community" in the American church today, followed by several hours of HORROR at the extreme position the author takes and the extensive and rather mindless proposal he sets forth as THE (one and only) "solution," perhaps punctuated with some thought-provoking opinions about how small groups can best be structured in churches. The author begins in the early chapters by taking aim (obviously with a sawed-off shotgun) at an enemy he calls "the plague of individualism". Red flags go up in the first chapter or two regarding the broad definition of the "individualism" enemy as the author begins to lob his grenade-like rhetoric well beyond issues such as vain conceit and self interest to the exclusion of others. It becomes clear as one reads further that this author boldly advocates against church members thinking about an issue on their own and reaching a conclusion that is in anyway different from their religious leaders. Next, the author's idea begins to surface that church members should put the needs of others ahead of their own needs. At this point, those who read beyond an 8th grade level become aware that the author might have entitled the book "How to Start a Cult." This conclusion is confirmed again and again throughout the book. The author refers to urban gang-leaders (who kill people who disagree with them) and exclusionary Amish elders (who engage in mental warfare with, and often shun people who disagree with them) as good examples of effective authority. The author recognizes that "there are abuses that must be guarded against," but does not account for this in his principle that members must make themselves of "one mind" with their leaders. The author advocates throughout the book that individual thinking is a bad thing, with statements like "there is no need for fresh thinking in this area - just fresh obedience." (Has this author totally missed the child-abuse issues in the Catholic Church, or the recent Amish rape trial in the midwest involving a young Amish girl that was repeatedly assaulted by various community members with NO ACTION being taken by the community authorities??) The author also contradicts himself throughout the book. First, he says that "individualism" is a recent phenomenon that didn't even have a name prior to the mid 1800's. Then, he quotes scripture with the twisted introduction, "Notice how [the apostle] Paul challenges the mind-set of individualism." (Hello!?!?! Why would Paul be challenging something that didn't exist until mid 1800's???) This particular misapplication of scripture reveals the author's frightening view that disagreeing with church leadership constitutes "individualism" - an enemy that the church "must" root out. Throughout the book, he quotes polls (i.e., NOT extensive, empiracle, published research data) about how Americans (at large) do not understand basic principles of the Bible. Then he takes this poll data (which must certainly be considered at least suspect as it applies to the whole of America - including non-Christians) and applies it to the Church. He concludes upon this mis-application of questionable data that our Christian community is ignorant of its core beliefs and is not "committed to growing in the crace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." All I know is that if Christ's words "Judge not, so that you are not judged," and mean anything, this author is in danger of a world of hurt. Again, what is really painful about this atrocious book is that I believe that the American church needs more community. What we do NOT need, however, is McCarthy-ism or facism masquerading as unity or community. I am afraid that I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone who is not solid enough in their knowledge of scripture to recognize its misapplication, or not proficient enough with critically analysis to distill an ounce of truth when its laced with a pound of potentially-fatal falsehood. - Be blessed.

NT Church for the 21st Century?.......2004-08-20

Randy Frazee's "The Connecting Church" is a book not unlike a coin; it has two sides--hope and frustration. Reading it will find you both wistful and pounding the table. Unfortunately, you end the book doing the latter.

Frazee is one of a cadre of author/pastors spearheading a self-proclaimed renaissance within Christianity. Often called "postmodern Christianity" or "The Emerging Church," this trend seeks to recover the spirit of the early New Testament Church. "The Connecting Church" embodies one of the most prominent aspects of Emerging theology: recovering deep human relationships via a "satellite house/neighborhood church" model.

Tested within his own church in TX, the ideas espoused by the author take small groups to the extreme. Instead of traveling by car to a small affinity group of ten or so, the small group is your entire neighborhood. You reach your neighborhood by incorporating the people in it into your group through strong relationships and friendship evangelism. In a variation, a set of Christians moves together into a neighborhood and pursues the same ends.

The part that few people will object to is living out a Mayberry-like ideal of community. You open your homes and lives to your group. You socialize with your group daily, almost to the exclusion of other relationships, pouring yourself relationally into a set of people that will stay together for years. Its an accumulation of social capital now sorely lacking in most people's lives.

The larger church body itself works to enact a consistent discipleship program that supports the neighborhood groups. It has a distinct preaching cycle that repeats yearly. This program has measurable checkoffs for spiritual growth, meaning the church can see how effective it is in this area. The teachings aim to release people from a prison of consumerism, careerism, and isolation into a balanced love of God and love for others. In its purest form, this model moves into a semi-communal living mode that can even include shared possessions.

A superficial reading of this book yields an immediate desire to make it work. I know that I would love to try to make such a community possible. But problems exist. As much as Frazee insists that people stay in one place, the nature of work today means that a family moves nearly every seven years, usually as a result of work situations. With the last recession forcing many families to move just to put food on the table, unless the Church in America is willing to work harder to help Christians keep their jobs, the dream of staying in one place is elusive. Truth is, the small rural communities revered in "The Connecting Church" are progressively becoming ghost towns because the jobs went elsewhere.

There are other issues with idealizing small, tightknit, rural communities; in the book, the very model Frazee encourages cannot be applied to small, rural communities at all! It's inherently a suburban or city-only model. It's odd that Frazee cannot provide a workable modern solution for the very type of community he idolizes. I live in the country, and as much as I'd like to implement Frazee's model here, the basic elements of it do not play well in the countryside.

Lastly, the emphasis on keeping neighbors together creates an unintentional ghetto-ization of the Church. If the residents of a rich neighborhood are encouraged to stay together exclusively, as is the poorer neighborhood, when will they mix? They used to mix on Sundays at the church, but Frazee encourages hanging with your group even at the whole church meetings. And as much as the goal is to create multigenerational, multicultural communities, most neighborhoods are remarkably homogeneous.

In the end, the proof of concept is in the doing. Churches in my area that have adopted the model in "The Connecting Church" have been disappointed in the results, many abandoning it altogether. People are quite set in their ways, and the old small group model that is based mostly on affinity is not that creaky, yet. Like the Israelites who had to entirely die off before their descendants finally entered the promised land, this generation of Christians may some day pass on and allow Frazee's model to assume prominence in an upcoming generation that fully embraces it.

"The Connecting Church" is filled with great ideas and will definitely get you thinking. Hopefully, Frazee will work out the bugs and find an audience willing to give it a try.

Essential Reading for All.......2004-07-17

Randy Frazee's book, "The Connecting Church", has influenced my thoughts on numerous areas of spirituality, Christian living, and church as much as any book I've read. Frazee's insights into daily life in today's large cities form an essential foundation for understanding so many of our current frustrations, both personal and institutional, both spiritual and emotional. To try to lead a spiritually or emotionally fulfilling life in the city, or to try to lead a church with any relevance to lives of citydwellers, one has to understand the basics of the development of the city.

It is worth mentioning here that cities are not generally mentioned in a favorable light in the Bible. The Genesis story, from the fate of Cain to the fate of Babel, indicates serious concerns that God has about the development of cities.

We should join Frazee, then, in not presuming that the lifetyle dictated by the modern city provides either an opportunity for personal fulfillment or, for Christian leaders, an opportunity for ministry. Maybe the city is the problem. Maybe the city developed from diverse forces which were oblivious to the spiritual and psychic needs of the self, such that to fulfill those needs, one needs to rebel against that which the city claims is normal daily life.

It is striking that the mode of daily life for over 99% of human history - in which one has a single circle of friends that span work, neighborhood, religious life and leisure, all of whom know each other and see each other spontaneously and frequently - has radically ended in the modern city. Now we have numerous circles of friends, who don't know the friends in the other circles, and very few of whom do we run into spontaneously. Rather, our get-togethers with friends are usually highly-scheduled and coordinated events, of necessity, in today's sprawled and fragmented city.

To think that one can have personal community, much less a church that ministers to people effectively, when we live this way, is a key source of our frustrations. Frazee's book further develops this thesis, with which I agree, and then advises the reader on creating the conditions for spiritual enrichment within the city.

Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need To Succeed In Life
Average customer rating:

Practical Yet Partial

A Good Analytical Book on Mentoring from a Christian Perspec

Very practical with solid foundations

Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need To Succeed In Life
Paul D. Stanley , and J. Robert Clinton
Manufacturer: Navpress Publishing Group
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Business & Investing | Subjects | Books
Motivational | Management & Leadership | Business & Investing | Subjects | Books
General | Christian Living | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
Business | Christian Living | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
General | Ministry & Church Leadership | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
Ministry | Ministry & Church Leadership | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
Inspirational | Spirituality | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
Similar Items:

Spiritual Mentoring: A Guide for Seeking and Giving Direction

The Making of a Leader

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The Mentor Handbook: Detailed Guidelines and Helps for Christian Mentors and Mentorees

Overcoming the Dark Side of Leadership: The Paradox of Personal Dysfunction

ASIN: 0891096388

Book Description

No one is capable of living life without help. Learn how mentoring relationships can put you years ahead of where you'd be on your own.

Customer Reviews:

Practical Yet Partial.......2005-07-16

This book is based on a simple finding: "Research on mid-career, contemporary leaders led to [the] conclusion - few leaders finish well". Further, in the case where leaders did finish well, "their relationship to another person significantly enhanced their development". Thus the stage is set for the subject of mentoring, which the authors describe as (the concise definition):

a relational experience
through which one person empowers another
by sharing God-given resources.

Stanley and Clinton are well respected authorities in the field of leadership development, and this book represents a popular and "lightweight" version of far larger tomes, so providing easy access to their ideas. The authors focus mainly on the types of mentor who may enrich our lives, and how. The book explores nine common mentor types, and "ten commandments" required for successful mentoring one-on-one. Two further types of mentoring receive special attention, namely The Constellation Model (a relational network of upward, downward, and lateral mentoring), and Peer Co-Mentoring (mutual mentoring with a close friend).

The emphasis on the "relational experience" of mentoring is arguably both the greatest strength and the greatest weakness of the book. On the one hand, it offers one - in the words of the publishers - "access to the wisdom, experience, vision, and direction of those who have gone before". On the other hand, there is a great deal of emphasis on the values, skills, etc. which are transferred to the one being mentored, yet limited appreciation of how mentoring might point to God. The authors hardly touch on the type of mentoring which focuses on the "encounter with the Holy", and the sovereign grace required for a Christian leader to succeed and survive. In short, it tends towards a "Latin" theology of mentoring.

The book has a strong foundation in research and experience, and for this alone it is well worth a look. It is characterised by simplicity and ease of reading, and makes excellent use of diagrams, tables, and real-life illustrations to present the material in a readable and approachable way. On the whole, it gives one a good grounding in some of the more practical aspects of mentoring and being mentored, and may encourage some readers to advance to the more "serious" works of Stanley and Clinton.

A Good Analytical Book on Mentoring from a Christian Perspec.......2002-05-07

Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need to Succeed in Life, by Paul D. Stanley and J. Robert Clinton, Colorado Springs, Navpress, 1992, 252 pages. Reviewed by J. L. Lee

Paul Stanley has over twenty years experience in leadership development. He has served as the international vice-president of the Navigators. His ministry has taken him to a variety of international locations where he has done both leadership training and consulting.

Dr. Robert Clinton has served on the faculty of the Fuller Theological Seminary as an associate professor of leadership for the school of world mission. He has completed extensive research in the field of leadership and specializes in leadership training, selection, and emergence patterns.

The thesis of this book is to show leaders a method they may use to "finish well." That method is to use mentoring as a leadership tool. The authors define the tool of mentoring in relationship terms as an experience where one person empowers another using divinely provided resources. The authors also clearly state the four objectives of the book on page 13.

1.) "How to be mentored even though there aren't enough mentors to go around"
2.) "An explanation of what makes mentoring work"
3.) "A balanced model of mentoring relationships"
4.) "Illustrations and ideas on how mentoring can work for you"

They answer the first objective in the first ten chapters of the book. This is accomplished by breaking down the task of mentoring into seven functions, Discipler, Spiritual Guide, Coach, Counselor, Teacher, Sponsor and Model. Model is further sub-divided into Contemporary and Historical Models. The first three mentoring functions are grouped together under the supra heading of Intensive Mentoring. The fourth through sixth functions are likewise grouped under the heading Occasional Mentoring. The two sub-types of models are considered under the heading Passive Mentoring.
The authors also define three essential dynamics of the mentoring process as Attraction, Responsiveness, and Accountability. These three dynamics are of greater importance in the more intensive types of mentoring. The three dynamics also address the second objective of the book, "what makes mentoring work."
The introduction of the seven mentoring functions and the three dynamics begins in chapter two, especially pages 41-45, and form the backbone of this book upon which most of the rest is expansion and elaboration. Chapter 11, especially pages 161-168, describes what the authors term the "Constellation Model" of mentoring. This model attempts to set forward a framework for the seven functions of mentoring detailed in chapters 3-10. This Constellation Model is defined in images of upward mentoring, downward mentoring, and peer co-mentoring. The peer co-mentoring is further described as either external (outside your organization) or internal (inside your organization). Peer co-mentoring is also described in terms of "close buddy", friend and acquaintance.
The fourth objective of the book is met throughout the book in the numerous illustrations and tidbit ideas for practical application of the mentoring concepts presented. This reviewer found chapters 13 and 14 to be especially helpful in meeting this objective. Chapter 13 listed "Ten Commandments of Mentoring" as well as insights from the mistakes, which the authors have made in mentoring. Chapter 14 presented five characteristics of leaders who finish well.
The book closes with an appendix that describes four principles of adult learning. The appendix is followed by a section of notes from the text. This section in turn is followed by a list of references cited in the text and an annotated bibliography.

Chapters three through ten form the core of the book and develop the material about the seven different functions of a mentor. These can also be understood to be seven different types of mentors.
Chapter three begins this section with a discussion of the Discipler Mentor. The chapter is descriptive and presents the basic growth habits of discipleship and a section of "hints for discipleship mentoring" that apply to both the disciple and the discipler. This chapter does not conclude with a chapter summary.
The second type of intensive mentoring, the spiritual guide, is described in chapter four. Again this chapter is descriptive with the major definitions being easily recognizable in boldface type font. This chapter delineates the functions of a spiritual guide and also gives a means of determining the need for a spiritual guide. It also does not conclude with a chapter summary.
Chapter five concludes the intensive mentoring functions with a development of the role of a coach. This chapter offers the mentoring dynamics, functions, and hints for the coach.
The idea of occasional mentoring is introduced in detail in chapter six with a discussion of the counselor mentor. Of special interest are the eight major empowerment functions of the counselor mentor as well as a section on hints for the counselor.
Occasional mentoring continues into chapter seven when the teacher is described as a mentor. Hints for the teacher-mentor and a section of tips to turn your teaching into mentoring are key sections of this chapter.
Occasional mentoring concludes in chapter eight when the sponsor is described. The sponsor functions and empowerment together with the practical hints on sponsor mentoring are useful listings. It's interesting that this chapter together with chapters five and ten are the only chapters dealing with the seven types of mentoring that offer chapter summaries at their conclusion. Several of the chapters do conclude with a section titled for further study. Chapters nine and ten take up the concept of passive mentoring by describing the role of first the contemporary model and then the historical model in the two chapters respectively.
As noted above, the heart of the book is found in chapters three through ten and each of these chapters in turn addresses the stated thesis of the book which is to present a method which leaders may use to finish well. While the concept of finishing well is not specifically addressed in great detail within the core of the book, in fact it is addressed most significantly in the final chapter, the methods presented in the core build up to and support the conclusion of the book with this thesis.
The book is very systematic and analytical in presenting a theory of mentoring. The structure appears easy to discern and the descriptive material tends to hold the reader's interest. It is a relatively easy read that seems to accomplish the purpose well which the authors set forth for it. This reviewer would highly recommend it to anyone interested in the subject of mentoring.

Very practical with solid foundations.......2001-04-18

Stanley and Clinton have written a very practical guide to developing mentoring relationships. By addressing several kinds of mentoring (from intentional discipleship to passive mentorship) they have digested sophisticated theory into reasonable methods. Throughout the book they also offer their own personal experiences as examples of the principles they wish to bring out, which adds a very readable flavor. At times the authors seem to treat the topic of relationships with a sterile pragmatism, which is my only complaint about the book. Perhaps Stanley and Clinton would do well to spend time reading Larry Crabb's book by the same name! Overrall, I appreciated this book and I am using some of the principles in my own ministry at Biola University.

Reflecting With God: Connecting Faith and Daily Life in Small Groups

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Reflecting With God: Connecting Faith and Daily Life in Small Groups
Abigail Johnson
Manufacturer: Alban Institute
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

General | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books

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ASIN: 1566992923

Book Description

Untangling the day-to-day issues in our multifaceted lives can seem daunting. Time to sit quietly and reflect is rare. If we are fortunate, we have good friends or close family members with whom to talk things through and find clarity, but many times we feel isolated and lonely. As people of faith, we add another layer to our reflections when we wonder where God fits into our lives.

In a broad sense, theological reflection happens any time that we wonder about God, our faith, our beliefs, and our values. In this book, however, Abigail Johnson offers a structured process for engaging in theological reflection by looking at a situation or event through a series of questions. These questions are designed to help individuals and small groups think through situations with the eyes of faith.

Johnson provides detailed instructions for group facilitators, making this book a valuable resource for any theological reflection leader. She demonstrates how theological reflection will enrich the faith life of the individual and increase group members' sense of belonging to God and to the whole people of God. She also shows how small groups engaging in theological reflection affects the ongoing life of a congregation—particularly in the community's worship and the members' practice of spiritual disciplines.

The Race to Reach Out: Connecting Newcomers to Christ in a New Century
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The Race to Reach Out: Connecting Newcomers to Christ in a New Century
Douglas T. Anderson , and Michael J. Coyner
Manufacturer: Abingdon Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Ministry | Ministry & Church Leadership | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0687066689

eMinistry: Connecting with the Net Generation
Average customer rating:

Very Good, But Laced with Post-Modern Paranoia

Beyond the paradigms of Christian Internet books

Understanding the times - and changing them.

eMinistry: Connecting with the Net Generation
Andrew Careaga
Manufacturer: Kregel Academic & Professional
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Church Administration | Ministry & Church Leadership | Christianity | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books
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ASIN: 0825423708

Book Description

(Foreword by Leonard Sweet) An Internet savvy youth pastor and journalist advises church leaders on creative and effective use of leading-edge technology to reach the Net Generation.

Customer Reviews:

Very Good, But Laced with Post-Modern Paranoia.......2001-06-16

Andrew Careaga has written a very good book about ministry in cyberspace and what he terms the N-geners.

This book is much more substantive and useful than his previous book on a related subject, E-vangelism. He has put a lot of work into this new work, and his argument is tight and focused. The ultimate point is to explore the nature of the newest generation (those following Generation-X). I found many of his insights to be very useful, especially as concerned distinctions between Gen-X and N-Geners. But a weakness is found in his rather two-dimensional analysis of 'Post-modernism.' His understanding of post-modernism seems incomplete, stressing the negatives while underplaying the strengths of this perspective on things. It becomes particularly annoying as he throws complaints about the pervasiveness of post-modernism within N-Gener thought. It reminds me of too much hollow sloganeering I have heard over the years -- 'Commies,' 'squares,' 'liberals,' and 'conservatives' -- these labels don't mean much when used sloppily. Nevertheless, the book makes a very important contribution that I think is worthy of notice.

The author has also prepared excellent resource references for the reader, and this deserves a great deal of praise.

This is a book that should be read by those who are interested in ministry, generational issues, and the Internet. I recommend it.

Beyond the paradigms of Christian Internet books.......2001-03-17

What makes this book such interesting reading is that the author is a journalist, volunteer youth pastor, and a self-professed lover and user of the Internet from online chess to chatrooms. Many Christian Internet books in the past have either been written by either Christian sociologists or by divinity school college professors who were forced to use, but not necessarily embrace the Internet technology. It is this difference in mentality and background that easily allows Mr. Careaga to see outside the box of paradigms and show us how the latest toy, research tool, and communications media know as the Internet is the ripest harvest field for Christians to glean for souls in years. Answering the call of the postmodern generation's quest for spirituality, the author delves into the motivations, attention spans, actions, and feelings of the "N-Generation", the new generation of net-savvy people. In fact, the "N-generation" is actually the first generation of people to be exposed to the wonders (and in some cases, the darkness) of the Internet since their birth. This is a book that is needed now in order to understand postmodern culture and their fascination with the virtuality of the Internet. I recommend this book to those who desire to understand the need to effectively communicate the love of Jesus to the postmodern world. We clearly see how to fulfill the Great Commission online and fully see the mandate to take the 2000 year old message of Jesus Christ to the year 2000 generation using year 2000 technology.

Understanding the times - and changing them........2001-02-25

Andrew Careaga is uniquely placed to help us understand the times we live in, from a Christian and Internet viewpoint. He's a trained journalist, working in the academic and youth-oriented environment of a university public relations department, and is also a youth pastor. So his insights into postmodernism, youth culture and effective communication are informed by firsthand experience. This is not a theoretical abstract book in any way.

Neither is it about technical web issues or even primarily about what Christians are doing to use the Internet for evangelism (the subject of his previous book 'E-vangelism'). The main focus is the modern world and what he terms the 'N-generation' (web-savvy young people) and how we can effectively communicate with them online.

The quotations and footnotes display a wide breadth of research, understanding and insight. At the end of each chapter are topics for further investigation and questions to consider. Some are very appropriate for small group/seminar discussion.

This very readable book deserves the widest possible circulation. There is just no other book which even attempts to cover the same ground. It should be required course reading for Bible college and seminary students. For anyone who wishes to understand issues of relating to the modern world through the Web, it's essential.

It is still largely true that the church has yet to realize the significance of the Internet and how it is changing society. As Christians, we can so easily be 10-20 years behind in our understanding and methods. But "the past is a different country". We cannot engage with today's culture without understanding it. Unless we do, we may condemn ourselves to being only easily able to reach the 'once-churched' instead of the 'never-churched'.

Therefore we must all have an advocacy role in enlightening the wider church about the power and effectiveness of the Internet - something which this book can achieve. I would encourage us all to do everything we can to cause this book to be read as widely as possible:

- ask your local library and church bookstall to stock it - write a review of the book for Christian publications or on websites - publicize it any other way you can - create a link directly to this Amazon page

The Hip-Hop Church: Connecting With the Movement Shaping Our Culture
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Simply The Best

An inspirational survey of how to reach out in an alternative manner.

must read...

When Hip Hop meets the church

Eye Opener

The Hip-Hop Church: Connecting With the Movement Shaping Our Culture
Efrem Smith , and Phil Jackson
Manufacturer: IVP Books
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

African-American Studies | Special Groups | Social Sciences | Nonfiction | Subjects | Books
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Starting Right

ASIN: 0830833293

Book Description

Hip-hop is here.The beats ring out in our cities. Hip-hop culture is all around us: in the clothes youth wear, in the music they listen to, in the ways they express themselves. It is the language they speak, the rhythm they move to. It is a culture familiar with the hard realities of our broken world; the generation raised with rap knows about the pain. They need to know about the hope.Enter the hip-hop church.Like the culture it rises from, the hip-hop church is relevant and bold. And it speaks to the heart. In this book, pastors Efrem Smith and Phil Jackson show the urgency of connecting hip-hop culture and church to reach a generation with the gospel of Jesus Christ. They give practical ideas from their urban churches and other hip-hop churches about how to engage and incorporate rap, break dancing, poetry and deejays to worship Jesus and preach his Word.Hip-hop culture is shaping the next generation. Ignoring it will not reduce its influence; it will only separate us from the youth moving to its rhythm. How will they hear Christ's message of truth and hope if we don't speak their language? And how can we speak their language if we don't understand and embrace their culture?Hear the beat. Join the beat. Become the beat that brings truth and hope to a hungry, hurting generation.

Customer Reviews:

Simply The Best.......2007-06-15

This is definitely a must have for any Leader who works with teens and is looking for ways to impact a future generation.

An inspirational survey of how to reach out in an alternative manner........2007-05-12

Efrem Smith and Phil Jackson's THE HIP-HOP CHURCH: CONNECTING WITH THE MOVEMENT SHAPING OUR CULTURE provides an important survey which advocates reaching spiritual souls through their own language - the music of hiphop. From understanding hiphop culture to bringing it into the church, any involved in a church and seeking to involve urban youth must have THE HIP-HOP CHURCH: it's an inspirational survey of how to reach out in an alternative manner.

must read..........2007-01-15

this book is a must read of any minister, youth worker, dj, music worker, or anyone dealing with the youth wanting to use the hip hop culture.

When Hip Hop meets the church.......2006-11-05

Efremm and Jackson do a great job bridging the gap between the hip hop generation and the church. They engage one without the defaming the the other. Great book and informative. it also gives diffrent ways to use hip hop in youth ministries.

Eye Opener.......2006-05-30

This book has open my eyes to a world that has so much to offer to The Kingdom Of Jesus the Christ....the book will help you understand the Hip-Hop Generation and help take back for the Glory of Christ....this book is a must read for everyone, even if you don't like Hip--Hop....

51 Creative Ideas for Marriage Mentors: Connecting Couples to Build Better Marriages

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51 Creative Ideas for Marriage Mentors: Connecting Couples to Build Better Marriages
Dr. Les Parrott III , and Dr. Leslie Parrott
Manufacturer: Zondervan
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Paperback

Marriage | Relationships | Health, Mind & Body | Subjects | Books

General | Religion & Spirituality | Subjects | Books

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ASIN: 0310270472

Book Description

Designed to work on its own or in tandem with the Parrotts’ other marriage mentoring resources, 51 Creative Ideas for Marriage Mentors will inspire fresh ideas, increase a sense of vision for the marriage mentoring process, and build the confidence of all marriage mentors, regardless of age or stage.

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